“Are you okay?” Tea asks, putting her hand on my arm. I haven’t spoken a word in sometime. The silence is deafening. My lips are chapped and my throat is tingling. I’m suddenly so thirsty I bet I can drink a one-gallon jug of water without pausing.

“Fine,” I finally manage. “So tell me more about your book.”

“Don’t try to change the subject,” she says, calling me on my shit.

I look away. Shrug. I search my mind for the last thing she had said. “So Tristan doesn’t like labels, huh?”

“No, at least that’s what he said to me.”

I shrug again and start to think of ways to get out of this room as soon as possible.

“Was he like this with you?” Tea asks.

Her enormous wide eyes somehow grow even bigger. Juliet would love her eyelashes. They’re so lush and full, unlike mine. Perhaps she might even say that Tea doesn’t need false lashes. No, come to think of it, Juliet’s not the ‘less is more’ kind of girl.

“Listen, I don’t feel really comfortable talking about this,” I say and start gathering my things. But she stops me.

“I’m sorry, I know this is probably really awkward for you,” Tea sighs. “I just don’t know what to do. I don’t know if he’s just being a normal guy or if something’s really wrong.”

I shrug.

“So, was he like that with you?” she asks again. I can leave. Right now.

If I just pack up my stuff and say that I really don’t want to talk about this, I can just leave. She can’t stop me. But when I look into her eyes and see that lost look on her face, I know that I can’t. I sigh and give in.

“Like what?” I ask.

“Secretive? Anti-labels? Did he mind calling you his girlfriend?”

“It was different then, Tea. We were both in high school. 11^th grade isn’t like freshman year of college. You think you’re so grown up then. Many people want to be in a relationship. Perhaps for no other reason except to say that they were in one.”

She nods and sighs. I’m making sense to her. I search my mind for some other words of explanation that I could offer her that won’t hurt her feelings.

“Besides, Tristan and I were best friends. For many years before we ever got together,” I say. “So when we got together, it was different. It was more serious, right from the beginning.”

Again, she sighs and looks away. I put my arm around her shoulders. They slouch under my touch.

“How long were you together?” she asks.

“Two years.”

“Do you think maybe he doesn’t want to get serious because he just got out of a serious relationship?” she asks. That’s exactly what I’m thinking.

“I’m sure. If it’s any consolation, that’s kind of how I feel.”

“What do you mean?” Tea asks.

I drop my arm from her shoulder, try to pull away. But she just leans on me and waits for my answer.

“Well, Simon calls me his girlfriend,” I say. “But I don’t really call him my boyfriend. We didn’t have a big discussion about it. He just started doing it. Without my permission, really. Maybe Tristan feels the same way. Maybe he just doesn’t want to complicate things right now, you know? I certainly don’t.”

I see her listening to me, but I’m not sure if she’s really hearing me.

“So what happened between you two?” she suddenly asks.

“What do you mean?” My heart sinks. I don’t want to talk about our breakup. By the puzzled look on her face, I don’t think that’s what she’s referring to.

“Well, you were kind of becoming friends again, right? He talked about you a bit and how things were getting more friendly and positive. But now, you’re not talking again? He said you were mad at him. What happened?”

Shit. Shit. Shit. I decide to fake it. “Nothing really.” I shrug, trying to pretend that everything’s okay.

I look at Tea. She’s not buying it. I have no idea if Tea knows about Tristan’s masquerade ball, but I have a feeling that she doesn’t. And there’s no way I’m going to tell her. It’s Tristan’s thing. He needs to tell her why he didn’t take her. Agh, I fuckin’ hate that guy!

“I don’t know. It’s sort of hard being friends again after a breakup. We tried for a while, but it just didn’t feel right. So we’re giving each other some space,” I say.

I’m gathering my stuff again. This time, I’m leaving for me. Before Tea entraps me in some other conversation that I have no interest in.

“But Tristan said that you were mad at him,” Tea presses. “What did he do?”

“Listen, Tea, I have to go. We’re just not friends anymore. Can we leave it at that?” I say, putting on my coat.

Tea stands up. I think she’s about to give me a hug and walk me to the elevator, but instead she blocks the door.

“I feel like you’re hiding something, Alice. Did something happen?” she asks. “I promise I won’t be mad. I just need to know the truth.”

“Nothing happened, Tea,” I say. I purposely use her name, the same way she used my name to make a point. “I have no interest in Tristan. We’re not even friends anymore. Seriously, you have nothing worry about.”

She doesn’t move away from the door.

“Can I get by, please?” I ask. “I really have to get back.”

Finally, she moves out of the way. Very reluctantly.

“You promise?” she asks. “You promise that nothing happened between you and Tristan?”

“Yes, yes, I promise,” I lie.

I don’t even know how to begin to answer that question.

I walk out of Tea’s building with the certain sense that she didn’t believe me. Honestly, I wasn’t very convincing, but it’s not my place to be. I’m mad at Tristan for a very legitimate reason, but it’s not one that I can share with her without hurting her feelings and embarrassing her. This is Tristan’s thing. It’s his responsibility to tell her. Or not tell her.

“Agh!” I scream in the elevator. “Shit. Shit. Shit, Tristan. Why do you have to be such an asshole?”

The elevator dings and the doors open. Two people enter and I take a deep breath. No more outbursts, I say to myself. And bite my lower lip to keep quiet.