I have no memory of the accident. One minute, I was driving on the freeway and the next, I’m in the hospital staring at the bright lights and all the staff looking down at me. They are milling around, yelling something, but I can’t really make out any of the words. I’m somewhere far away. Not above them, but definitely not entirely in my body either. After that, it all fades to black. I lose all sense of time. When I wake up, Finn is the first person I see. He’s there sleeping in the chair next to me. I can’t speak out to him. I can’t move a finger. He looks so peaceful sleeping sitting up like that. I watch him. I don’t entirely believe that it’s him. Why would he, of all people, be here? Where’s Lila? Where are my parents?

Blackness descends again. Sometime later, I wake up again. My eyelids feel heavy. Finn is there again. He’s looking at something on his phone. I want to call out to him, but my mouth is too difficult to open. He sees me. At least, I think he does. Then, I realize that I can move my finger. I press it as hard as I can into his hand. The most beautiful smile forms on his face. His eyes fill with hope, and I know that it’s going to be okay.

Over the next few weeks, my recovery is slow, boring and cumbersome. My parents come see me. Lila tells me that they flew out the night of the accident and have been here ever since. They come visit me for hours each day, along with Lila. They both seem to like Finn a lot. They talk to him all the time, and he continues to stay with me. It feels like he’s never not here. To pass the time, he reads to me and we watch Netflix together. I fall in love with the quietness of his voice and the roar of his laughter. He laughs with his whole body. Unapologetically. I remember when I used to laugh like that. But nowadays, my laughter is limited by all the tubes, bandages and fear of pain. Then the bandages come off. I’m terrified of the person I’d see underneath. Horrified of not having my old face again. In the past, I remember freaking out about every stupid pimple or imperfection. But now, I want to have my old face back more than anything. When I look in the mirror the first time, I see her looking back at me. I’m a little disheveled and rough around the edges, but overall, I’m me. When I turn to Finn, the look on his face tells me what he’s thinking.

He thinks I’m beautiful. Finn Dalton thinks I’m beautiful!

“Wow,” Finn says coming into the room. The nurses have helped me change into the loose fitting, black dress that Lila bought for me. I had an hour or so to get my hair and makeup in order. I’m getting discharged tomorrow and, to celebrate the occasion, he is taking me out on a date. Not far, just to the roof. But it’s still a date!

“You look…breathtaking,” he says. I smile as my heart fills with joy.

“Thank you. You too,” I mumble. That’s quite an understatement. Finn is dressed in a tailored grey suit without a tie. The white button-down shirt is perfectly starched, bringing out the olive color in his skin and the brightness of his eyes. His hair falls loosely into his eyes, but in that perfect casual way which makes girls swoon.

“Are you ready?” Finn asks. I nod and he wheels me away. We take the service elevator to the top.

“Are you sure we’re allowed to be here?”

“No,” he says, nonchalantly. “But I got everything ready.”

When the elevator doors open, I see a little set up at the edge of the roof. String lights wrap around the railing creating a cozy atmosphere around the little table and one chair.

“One chair?” I ask.

He points to my wheelchair.

“Oh, of course!”

He laughs and pushes me forward.

“What are we having?” I ask.

“Something very gourmet. California pizza kitchen.”

That sounds perfect! I love their pizza, and I haven’t had it in ages. When we finally get to the table, I see that the food may not be gourmet, but the setting definitely is. The table is covered in thick, white linen and set with expensive plates and cutlery. There’s even a daffodil and daisy centerpiece.

“Lila told me that these were your favorite flowers,” Finn says.

“They are,” I say.

When he opens the covered silver platter, I see a variety of pizza slices placed carefully in a round pizza.

“I wasn’t sure which ones you preferred, so I got a little bit of both.”

“I’ll start with a slice of pesto,” I say.

“Pesto, it is.” Finn takes a slice of Hawaiian pizza for himself.

After pouring us some wine, he sits down across from me and looks at me.

“I’d like to make a toast,” I say.

He nods.

“I’m not much of a toast maker, but I just feel like I have to say something to you. You have done so much for me over these last few weeks, and I will never be able to repay you. You have been there for me, even though…before this accident, I was horrible to you.”

“No, you weren’t.”

“Yes, I was. Don’t interrupt.” He flashes a coy smile and waits. “And so, I just want to take this opportunity to thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for everything that you’ve done. From paying for all of my medical bills to just being there with me. Day in and day out. Without you, living in that hospital for so long wouldn’t have been that fun.”

“Thank you,” Finn says after I’m done. “And I would like to say something too. I’m so happy that you have made such a swift recovery. It has been a pleasure spending all this time with you. And I hope that we can continue to spend time together in the future.”

The rest of the dinner isn’t so serious. We joke, we laugh. We talk about stupid old movies and shows. He tells me that the first time he wanted to be an actor was when he saw the Brady Bunch on television. Mr. Brady made him feel like families on television were better than families in real life, and he wanted to go off and find himself a television family. I tell him that the first clothes I ever made were for my childhood cat. I used to torture her by running around and try to measure her to make the sweater just right. It was soon after that I realized that it was easier to get people’s measurements and made Lila a t-shirt.

After stuffing ourselves silly with pizza and wine, we take a break from eating. He wheels me out to the opposite side of the roof and runs back for his chair. He sits down next to me, takes my hand in his, and we look out over the lights of Los Angeles in front of us. The world is buzzing with activity, but we’re all above all that. Up here, there’s nothing but peace and quiet. Not even a single insect dares to interrupt our silence.

“I love you, Chloe,” Finn suddenly says, completely out of the blue. I turn to face him. He isn’t even looking at me. He’s looking somewhere far off in the distance.

For a second, I think that I had misheard him.

“What?”

“I love you,” he repeats himself in the exact same tone. He turns to me. “I’ve never said that to anyone before. Not to anyone but my mom.”

“You love me?” I ask skeptically. “But how…do you know?”

“I used to ask that same question. And now I know. I know because I love you. Because of a million different reasons. But mainly because I want to spend all of my time with you. In all of these weeks, even when you could barely speak, and now that you’re almost back to normal, I’ve always wanted to spend time with you. I looked forward to seeing you, no matter how much time has passed. Even if I had just gone out for a snack to the vending machine. I love you, Chloe. And I just wanted you to know that.”

I stare at him. At his intense eyes. His beautiful lips. I don’t know what to say. I should say what I feel. That I love him too, and that I’ve loved him since our first date. Since that moment when I thought that someone had stood me up and had rescued me. But for some reason I choke up. Tears start to gather.

“Oh my God, are you okay?” he asks, taking my face into his hands and wiping my tears with his strong thumbs. I nod.

“I’m sorry,” I apologize for crying more than anything else.

“No, I’m the one who’s sorry. That was too much for you. I shouldn’t have come on so strong.”

I shake my head, no. He doesn’t get it. These are tears of joy. Relief. Hope. I look into his eyes and then pull myself a little closer to him. When I close my eyes, his lips touch mine, and sparks of electricity course through me. It feels just like the first time. His touch causes this chemical reaction in my body, one that I can’t control. His tongue makes his way into my mouth as he buries his hands in my hair and pulls slightly. My heartbeat speeds up, and we start to move as one. His hands run down my neck and shivers run up my spine. As his tongue demands more and more of my mouth, his fingers make their way along the top of my breasts. I start to breathe a little faster. I run my fingers down his body and stop at his thighs. I move my hand up and down his thighs, and his breathing speeds up to match mine. His erection is already full-fledged, and I press down on it, a little bit.

“Oh, Chloe,” he moans into my ear.

“Does it feel good?” I ask. He nods through the kiss.

We mess around for a little bit longer, but never cross the line. My doctor has made it clear to me that I can’t participate in any recreational activities quite yet, and that includes sex. As much as I want to violate that rule, I can’t. A big part of me is relieved when Finn pulls away first. He was there when the doctor explained all the rules of recovery to me.

After we stop making out like teenagers, he takes my hand in his and we again look out over the roof, admiring the lights below.

“Finn,” I say after a while.

“Yeah?” he responds after a moment. Lost in thought.

“I love you too.”