(A Crowded Past)

NOW

(Evan)

I stood on the front porch for a few seconds and looked around. Toward the end railing where I’d hide against the side of the house and smoke. I’d stand there and wait for Anna to sneak out of the house. The back had been overgrown when I first met Anna and Adena but then someone who bought the empty lot had it all cut down. That gave Anna a really easy escape route. And I didn’t have to stand against the house and smell garbage.

I couldn’t help myself as I walked to the end of the porch and leaned over to see. There were trashcans there but no longer were they the bent metal ones. These ones were black, plastic, tall, and on wheels.

“Hey, what are you looking for?”

I turned and found Ashley standing there. I had caught sight of her at the funeral but she was on the other side of the casket, with Adena.

“Ash,” I said. “Look at you.”

She wasted no time in throwing her arms around me. She had always been a hugger. And she would hug you until you hugged her back.

I put my right hand to her back and pulled a little.

“Good to see you,” I said. “I’m sorry for the circumstances.”

“She’s inside somewhere,” Ashley said. “Adena, I mean. I’m sure she’d love to see you.”

“Yeah. I’m going to make my rounds before I head back.”

“Head back?”

“I drove down for the funeral,” I said.

“We’re having a little party,” Ashley said. “Might do everyone some good.”

“You don’t think it’s a little fucked up to have people drinking and driving considering what just happened?”

Ashley shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t make the rules. I’m just here. How are you, Evan?”

“I’m wonderful, Ash. How are you?”

“The same.”

“Still working at that gift wrap place?”

“It’s not a gift wrap place,” she said. She shoved at me. “You’re such a dick.”

“What? It’s a gift wrap place. It’s got presents in the window.”

“Evan,” someone called out. It was an old buddy, Bobby, as he hurried up to the porch. Wearing a shirt I swore he had in high school, with jeans that had massive holes in the knees.

“Bobby,” I said. “Holy shit, brother.”

We bumped fists and hugged.

“What a fucked up day,” Bobby said.

“Yeah,” I said. “How are you, man?”

“Good.”

“Bobby’s an EMT,” Ashley said. She then leaned toward me and whispered, “He was there…”

“Oh, fuck,” I said.

Bobby nodded. “I couldn’t go to the funeral today. After what I saw… ah, shit. I just wanted to swing by and grab a drink. See Adena. Heard you were in town.”

“Just for today,” I said. I had said that about eighty times so far. As though I was trying to convince myself there was no fucking way in hell I would sleep in this town, even for one night.

“Shit,” Bobby said. “Okay. Well I have to work the midnight shift tonight. But I needed to swing by. It was good to see you, man. Hopefully we can hook up again soon.”

“Yeah, that would be great,” I said.

Bobby turned and went inside the house.

“You’re such a fucking liar,” Ashley said.

“What?”

“You’re not going to hook up again soon with anyone here.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

“You left and left it all behind, Evan. Everyone knows that. You’re like a ghost walking around here.”

“Maybe I am, Ash. But I have good reason.”

“You think we all don’t know what that reason is?”

I slipped my hands into my pockets. I took a few steps back. I didn’t come here to kick up old shit from years ago.

“I’m sorry,” Ashley said. “It’s a weird day. We all miss you, Evan. Maybe now that she’s gone now you could be around more.”

“Don’t count on it,” I said. “Life moves forward.”

“Except me. And most of this town. I’m still wrapping presents.”

“See, told you,” I said with a grin.

Ashley threw me the middle finger. “For the record, we sell luxury goods. And since I showed Tina how to do business online, it’s been booming. She finally divorced Rick after catching him cheating and she gave me half the business.”

“That’s awesome, Ash,” I said. “You look fantastic too. I’m serious.”

“You’re not getting in my pants, Evan.”

I stepped toward her. I didn’t stop until there was an inch between us. “Oh, Ash, you’re cute. You and I both know if that’s what I wanted…” I winked at her.

Her cheeks flushed.

“Stop,” she said. “We’re not in high school.”

“I know. Imagine what could happen now.”

Ashley laughed. “Still think you got it, huh?”

“I know I do,” I said. “It’s really good to see you again.”

I opened the door to the house and it was very familiar. The house. The people. The party scene.

No matter where I walked someone grabbed my arm. All I wanted to do was find Adena. I got cornered by Chloe for a crying hug. Ella and Leah wanted to talk about the time I got drunk and was dared to run naked down the street. The night I ended up running right by a cop car and didn’t realize it. So I had to pretend I was being attacked by bees. I told the cop I stripped naked to get them off my clothes. He parked his car in the middle of the street, put his lights on, and made me walk back down the street for everyone to see. Not that I had anything to hide or be ashamed of.

Each person I ran into I asked them where Adena was. She was nowhere to be found. By the time I worked my way to the back door, I started to get nervous. Out of everyone in that damn house I wasn’t sure anyone but me understood what Adena fully went through. And even then I was sure I didn’t have the complete story. Adena was forever forgotten and overshadowed because she was good. That was maybe the worst part of her life. Adena was good and was known for being so. Which meant if she went out, Beth knew she’d come home five minutes before curfew. If there was a big test, everyone knew Adena would study and do her best. Yet if Anna came home an hour after curfew, that was considered a blessing because at least she came home. And if Anna passed a class without a meeting with the teacher and the guidance counselor, you would have sworn she discovered a new planet or something.

I opened the door to the back porch and stepped out.

It was almost dark and half the people that stopped by were gone. This wasn’t some well thought out catered affair. That’s not how things went in this town. If you wanted a drink, you brought a drink. If you got hungry, you ordered a pizza and had it delivered.

Andy and Riley were sitting at an old table in rusted chairs. The table had a hole in the middle for an umbrella but there was no umbrella there.

“Brother man,” Andy said, his words slurring. “Come sit, have a drink.”

“No,” I said. “You better not be driving.”

“I got him,” Riley said. She then lifted a can of soda. “I’m DD tonight. I brought my SUV for a reason. I can fit five legally. Ten illegally. But I figure if I get pulled over, it’s better than having these morons drive, right?”

“Good call,” I said. “How are you, Riley?”

“Just dandy,” she said. “Walking a fucking tightrope all day and my feet are tired.”

“Come walk this way, babe,” Andy said.

“Oh, please,” Riley said. “You had your chance. And you couldn’t get it up.”

I laughed.

“Hey, fuck you,” Andy spat at me. Then he looked at Riley. “That was years ago. People were in the room. We were in the closet. You were… aggressive…”

“I knew what I wanted then,” Riley said.

Andy looked at me. “Help me out, man.”

“I can’t help here,” I said. “If Riley came at me… I’d know what to do.”

“Fuck you again,” Andy said. “Fuck both of you.”

Andy pushed back from the table. The rusted chair groaned and tipped over. Andy stood and turned, losing his balance and fell right toward the railing. He caught himself and leaned over it, swaying back and forth like the last loose leaf in an autumn breeze.

“You okay with him?” I asked Riley.

“I’m fine,” she said. “It’s all the same, Evan. I’m going to start rounding them up. It’s been a long day.”

“Yeah. I probably should start heading back myself.”

Riley stood up. “Well, it’s been a fun chat.”

I always liked Riley. She was fierce and bold. Forever picked on for being a tom boy, but she was the first girl to look like a woman, if you know what I mean. So she was able to pull off this stunning womanly figure but had the athletic ability of a guy. Nobody could ever tame her.

Plus, she didn’t take bullshit from anyone and wasn’t afraid to call anyone out.

She took one step away and I reached for her hand. “Riley. Hey. Listen…”

“What?” she asked.

“I’ve been here for over an hour and haven’t seen Adena…”

“You only got here an hour ago?”

“Well, Mike wanted to stop over at Donkey’s.”

Riley snorted. “That fucking dive.”

“He’s been down about his old man.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s sad.”

“Where is Adena?” I asked. “I wanted to see her before I left.”

“You’re shit out of luck, Evan.”

“Why?”

Riley threw her head to the left.

I looked and saw someone in a chair in the corner of the porch. Curled up in a chair with the hood of a hoodie pulled over their face.

“Seriously?” I asked.

“She hit the bottle hard and passed out,” Riley said. “Probably for the better. Hey, listen, I’m going to wrangle up these drunk assholes. Do me a favor and carry her to her bed. You know, before you leave.”

I looked at Riley and she grinned like a smart ass.

She knew… and I knew… I wasn’t leaving tonight.