Emma

The weekend we spent together was out of this world. It’s the only way I can describe it sufficiently without using every single word in my vocabulary, more than once.

Friday we spent all day in bed, only leaving to shower or eat, sometimes taking loooong showers that necessitated another washing. Eating, only to have to shower again an hour later. I think we may have exceeded the water bills he’s had for a month in one day but it was great.

Saturday I expected to do the same, looking forward to another day spent lazing around and having hot sex but Colt surprised me, saying that while he adored my body and sex was definitely top of the list of things to do, he also just wanted to spend time with me, on a date.

That date took all day. First he took me to the pier where we found this little ice cream cart and ate the biggest cones I have ever seen. Then we went to lunch at this little Italian place with big booths where I got to eat in public while also being hidden away.

He wanted to go shopping after that because the clothes he sent out for wouldn’t cut it for him. Apparently, he wanted designer silks and all that stuff for me but I refused, taking him to a little flea market near my neighborhood instead where I spent my money getting a few pairs of shorts and t-shirts and this one little sleep shirt that made his eyes roll to the back of his head when I wore it later that night.

Sunday I couldn’t deny him anymore so I took him to meet Aunt Sue who almost kissed him senseless. She loves Colton. Don’t believe my estimation, she actually said it and treated him like a king the entire two hours we were there.

She fed him her homemade meatloaf, mashed potatoes and even pulled out her much sought after chocolate fudge cake. I knew she was telling the truth when that happened because Aunt Sue never feeds a stranger her fudge cake. Never.

After that, we strolled in the park and I even let him convince me to play with a Frisbee. Not for long because I now know why I didn’t even try out for sports in school. I suck.

In the afternoon, we went to the ice rink and I got to fall on my ass a million times while he skated around, his speed so impressive I can’t fathom why he didn’t try to stick it out and go pro.

It was great until Harley showed up, grinning, and dared him to play a game. I got to sit in the team box and watch as Colt kicked his ass, cheering so loud I still feel hoarse.

I had the best weekend I have ever had but it hasn’t stopped me from thinking, and thinking, and thinking some more. Colt basically proposed to me.

He may not have given me the ring and gone down on bended knee - I can’t imagine him ever doing that anyway - but it still remains that he told me point blank that he isn’t letting me go and he expects marriage and babies and all the bells and whistles.

A huge part of me wanted to scream yes on the spot because it’s exactly what I could want. I love him, so it’s not that much of a stretch to think that somewhere down the line I would have expected something like this, no matter what limitations we were working with before.

I wanted to yell a yes and just take what I wanted for once but I couldn’t. I won’t ever do that to Colt. Right now he’s raw from hearing about my violation and I get that. That doesn’t mean that I should take advantage of what he’s feeling and the vulnerability that’s driving him.

I think he may really care for me, a lot, and I am so happy that we’ve moved on from just sex and an affair that may have been months long to affection.

It’s progress and that is much better than what I thought would happen between us, but it’s not enough for me to just stop thinking and say yes. I want to marry someone who loves me and if Colt can’t do that, then we’ll stay as we are, with me hoping for more no matter how long it takes, or eventually…

I won’t think about eventually. I’ll just wait and hope for the best. Colt deserves more too. I love him enough to want him to experience love. He needs to have love and feel it in return and if that isn’t going to be with me then, as much as it hurts, I’ll stand aside so he can have that.

Not now though, I am nowhere near ready to even contemplate doing that. Maybe one day, far into the future, I will be strong enough to do what’s right.

If he doesn’t love me by then.

I’ll work hard to make him feel that way but if it never happens, then we both deserve a lot more and it will be time to call it.

Until then, I’m going to be happy and do everything I can to make him happy.

“Hey, baby,” he murmurs sleepily, coming up behind me where I’m applying make-up and checking my hair in the bathroom mirror.

He snuggles into me, pulling my back to his front and I lean in, soaking up his heat and the drowsy kiss he plants on my nape.

“Morning.”

“Hhhmm, you smell good. Do we have to go to work?” he whines making me laugh and shake my head at his little boy voice.

“Yes, Mr. James, we most certainly do. I have absolutely no idea what I’m going to tell Mira though so don’t even try to wheedle with me this morning, I’m in a shitty mood,” I warn.

He pouts at me before chuckling and squeezing my waist, his brown eyes sparkling when I narrow mine.

“You don’t have to tell her a thing. I called in on Thursday and told her you were working on a last minute urgent project for me.”

He waggles his eyebrows at me and I turn to slap his chest playfully.

“Is that code for having nonstop sex?”

“Nope, that’s code for I was a dick to my girlfriend and now I need four days to convince her to love me again before I lose my mind,” he murmurs, kissing my nose.

He’s so sweet it’s hard to form a scowl and shove him away.

“Flattery won’t work. Shower, now, so you can ruin my reputation as a shy, nondescript girl and take me in to work.”

I groan, knowing that the office will be buzzing when we show up together but the man will not take no for an answer, even threatened to take the bus if I insisted.

That’s even worse than arriving in his freaking car so I caved, eventually, and now I have to deal with the fall out.

“Stop worrying. Who the fuck cares if anyone knows we’re together? They’ll get over it or they can screw off, as far as I’m concerned.” He growls, walking into the shower.

The view of his tight behind and muscled back have me rethinking work. Jesus, the man is one fine example of perfection I think, watching his back and ass flex when he raises his arms to wash his hair. Colton is hot, very, very sexy and I take the time to appreciate his body while he showers, ignoring his cocky grin when he saunters out, a towel hanging loosely from his hand.

“Like what you see, Emma?”

“Yes,” I whisper, the sight of his engorged shaft making my mouth water.

I have become a sex fiend, no doubt. Just looking at him has my sex clenching and heating, the memory of what he feels like inside me making my nipples bead and beg for just another hour of him.

I resist, groaning when he leans in to kiss me heatedly and pull back only when I need to breathe. Will I ever not want Colt, I ask myself, following him to watch while he towels himself off and ambles into the closet to dress.

I have to turn away when I feel moisture pool in my panties and coach myself through a breathing exercise when he purposely bends over and his pants pull across his ass.

“We are going to work,” I say.

“Are you trying to convince me or yourself you actually want to go?” he chuckles.

“Shut up. Aren’t you the boss? I thought you were a workaholic CEO who only came down from the ivory tower to screw and bite heads off.”

“I have you to screw, Em, and I only want to bite into that gorgeous ass of yours.”

I glower, biting my lip to stop a smile and pout when he laughs at me, his sense of humor restored now that I’ve agreed to move in with him - it’s a long story but basically, he tied me to the bed and drove me insane with need until I gave him one concession.

I shouldn’t even have thought about it never mind agreed but let’s face it, what Colton does to me with his tongue and fingers is not something I can fight against. By the time I yelled a yes to moving in I was crying and insensible with lust.

“You’re a bully.”

“I know. But it worked. And now, my lady, we eat and then I take us both off to work. Where you will tell anybody who asks that you’re my girlfriend and if they have anything to say, you call me and I’ll bully them.”

I huff, ignoring his humor and wander into the kitchen, grabbing two bowls and dumping muesli into both.

“I don’t eat-”

“It’s good for you and you’ll eat what I tell you to! Bacon and eggs isn’t good for you every morning,” I tell him, watching him until he sighs and grumbles, shoveling muesli into his mouth reluctantly.

We eat in silence, him trying not to laugh at me while I worry about what the heck people are going to say to me at work.

“You’re a terrible boss.” I finally sigh when we’re in the elevator and heading down to the lobby.

He snorts and I feel my cheeks heat when he licks my ear and fondles my ass crack.

“Oh, I don’t know, babe, I kinda thought that I offered a lot by way of incentive this weekend.”

“Pervert.”

“Your pervert.” He chuckles, dodging my elbow and walking out on a laugh when the doors open.

I follow, twisting my hands as the car pulls away, my nerves so tense I swear I’d snap if a breeze hit me now. Colton takes my hand, twining his fingers through mine and makes me look at him.

“Are you happy to be with me, Emma?”

“What? Of course, why would you even ask?” I mumble, squeezing his hand between two of mine.

“Then stop thinking about what other people think and concentrate on you and me. You’re happy with me and I am happy, more than happy, with you. As long as we feel that way, I don’t care what others have to say.”

“Why do you always make things sound so simple when we both know it isn’t?” I grouch, letting him kiss me because I want to.

“Because it is, babe. I’ve spent all my life thinking I only need work, sex and order to make me happy. Now that I have you, I know that what I need is someone who makes me want to have more. I’m not going to overthink everything just to fit in with what people think. If I do that then I lose you and that I won’t accept,” he says solemnly, his conviction giving me a boost of courage.

“You better mean that, Colton, because if I have to go through the third degree today and you dump me, I will go stalker psycho on you and make your life hell. You have no idea what office gossip is like.”

Shit. This is going to be so bad, I think swallowing when the car stops and Colton slides out, holding his hand out for me to take. I accept it, my fingers trembling until he tightens his grasp and get out with my heart racing and a false smile plastered to my face.

I’m relatively sedate all the way through the lobby and onto the elevator until he lets me and two other people off on my floor and yells at me.

“Come to my office at lunchtime. I’ll feed you if you let me eat what I like!”

Men!

People are already whispering when I walk by, running the gauntlet towards my cubicle, which seems miles away. I ignore the stares and whispers and fall into my chair, powering up my computer with a sniffle of annoyance.

The rest of the morning goes somewhat smoothly. I get through six reports and clean up some files that are a mess, make coffee for myself twice and check through Mira’s diary.

She breezes in around ten, takes one look at me and curls a finger to let me know she wants me in her office. I’m shaking by the time I walk in and close the door, expecting recriminations or some sort of dressing down.

She throws herself at me instead and hugs me hard, pushing me away to give me a pitiful look.

“Don’t ever leave me again, Emma! I had to use one of the other interns and they fucked everything up. I had to type my own shit up and I made so many typos it was useless and then the reports didn’t get done and that little asshole makes piss coffee and…I don’t care if you’re sleeping with Colton, just cleaning his floors or having sex with a cross dresser on Fourth, you come to work and don’t ever leave me to the mercy of those animals again.”

Her dramatics make me snort and a laugh bursts out of me so hard I see her freeze before she smiles and sighs, flopping behind her desk with a groan.

“I need coffee, Em, the kind only you can make and then I neeeeed you to help me figure out why the Jameson deal isn’t working before Colton gets a hold of the files and chews my tits.”

“Aye, aye, captain! Coffee, maybe a donut from the cafeteria? And then I will be in here working my ass off,” I promise, flushing when she grins and flutters her lashes at me.

“Chocolate and get yourself one, too. I’ll close my eyes while you eat. Oh my God, Emma, you’re such a weirdo but my life fell apart without you.”

I’m not exactly comfortable with the things she’s saying but I like Mira enough that I manage a smile and salute her before walking out of her office.

The cafeteria is empty of any morning breakfast eaters when I rush in to get three donuts - Mira will chew off my leg if I only give her one - so I am in an out in minutes and riding upstairs again with two donuts for her, one for myself and a definite hankering for another cup of coffee.

I’m so distracted thinking about what I have to do to get through all the Jameson paperwork that I almost lose function in my legs when something occurs to me.

Condoms.

Okay, so it’s weird that it hits me while I’m considering Mira’s love for rubber bands on the files, but think about it I do, and when it filters in, I stop dead and feel my face drain of blood.

Oh, heck. Hell. Shit.

I’m on the pill to regulate my cycle but I haven’t had one since Wednesday morning and-

Don’t freak out! Do not freak out, I tell myself as the doors open and I walk through the office. This time I don’t care if everyone’s staring at me and whispering or smirking.

This time all I can think about is the fact that I never once considered protection and that I could be in some serious trouble. For once I don’t castigate myself when I lock it all down and refuse to think about it, the old adage about burying my head in the sand and hiding from life coming to mind.

Nope. No. I am in a good mood. I have the man I love. My boss rocks and my life is good, despite the office grapevine being on full alert and watching me like a hawk.

I’m not thinking about this for another minute, not until I have to. So I push it aside, plant a smile on my face and walk into the kitchen to make decent coffee.

By the time I get to Mira’s office, I’m on level ground and I smile and roll my eyes when I see the state of her desk and start clearing up while she inhales a donut.

“Sit and eat first and then you can silently judge me for my slovenly ways.”

“Okay.”

As promised, she doesn’t look at me once while I savor the donut, Colton’s insistence that muesli isn’t enough for breakfast proving true when my appetite comes in full force and I inhale the chocolaty goodness.

When I’m done, I clear my throat and sip at my coffee while Mira turns to me with a grin.

“Colton James? Honestly, Emma! I’d have never believed it until he called me and tried to give me some spiel about a project he needed you on.”

I blush and look down, my discomfort still at a level that talking about anything with Mira isn’t easy, never mind having a discussion about my relationship.

“Look, honey, I’m not going to rag you about it or sit here and go on and on about your life. I know that’s not you. I just want you to know that I am happy for you and I hope you’re okay. Last week was the pits for me, seeing you so sad and not knowing how to fix it. I love having you work with me and I will die if you ever leave me but all that aside, I hope you’re okay and that you know what you’re doing. If you do then I say good for you. Now. This mess is all my doing and I have no idea how to clean it up. To work, intern!”

I oblige and an hour later I have everything cleared away and in the right files while Mira pours through financials and clauses and we dissect the last quarter’s accounts.

“Something isn’t right with these figures,” I say after checking them over for a third time.

Mira glances up and comes over to peer at the paperwork over my shoulder, her breath stilling when she sees what I’m pointing to.

“Oh my God. Emma! I, shit, fuck, this is bad. If this is right, it means that someone has dropped the ball and we’ve been doing business with Jameson at a deficit for the last year!”

Um, yeah, I kinda get that, which is why my heart is pumping like a drum and I feel slightly queasy. On the bright side, I’m no longer as focused on the other thing I refuse to think about and more concerned with who’s head is going to roll when Colt and Harley see this.

“We need to get this upstairs, right now. Come on,” Mira says, her hands shaking as she smooths her hair and buttons up her jacket, her movements jerky and unsteady.

“Mira. We need to follow the trail and double check who handled this account. It’s no use going up there with half the details and having them go nuts on you for answers.”

She stills, takes a deep breath and falls into her seat with a plop, her face pale.

“I already have an idea who it is, Emma, but you’re right, we need to have all the answers and hope to hell that Colton can fix this or we’re all in deep shit. This is financials, babe, and that falls under my department, no matter how much I want to argue. It’s not my account but it sure as shit is my responsibility.”

She’s near hysteria by now so I put the files down and get her another cup of coffee before digging in again. Usually this is easy for me, numbers and me just mix, but today I feel like I’m wading through quicksand as I go through reports and accounts and check it all over no less than four times before making a decision.

Mira’s on tenterhooks the whole time and by the time I look at the clock it’s passed lunchtime. Shit.

The door bursts open just as I’m about to tell Mira I need to go and I look up to see the man himself standing there, glaring at me.

“You forget me, Emma?”

“No, I, I sorta got into this, er, time just got away from me.” I stutter, feeling like a heel because Mira looks like she’s about to hyperventilate.

Colton stops, looks at me closely and then turns to Mira with a frown.

“Mi, you okay?”

She tries to nod but bursts into tears instead, the once confident and powerful woman I know crumbling into a heap of tears and mumbled explanations.

“What the hell is going on here?”

“Mira, are you-”

“Tell him, Emma. I just can’t.”

Her attempts to calm down aren’t as successful and I turn to Colton with a grimace.

“We’ve been looking into some problems with the Jameson account for the last week before…well, we’ve been swamped this morning after I found this.”

I hand him the files and watch him sit, the concentration on his face astounding. It’s only when he’s completely done reading that he looks up calmly and keeps his tone level.

“Stop crying, Mi. Em, I want you to take this and compile a report and a presentation with all the points you outlined here. I want exact dates and figures and who signed off on it all and even breathed near the accounts. Mira, stop having a breakdown, I don’t blame you. They’re responsible for their own shit and if they’ve been doing this for an entire year you can bet they’ve learned how to cover their tracks. Emma, good work spotting this. If you’re willing to leave Mira at any time, you’ve more than earned a spot on the team as well as a promotion.”

That makes Mira wail harder and Colton and I both laugh when she sniffs, falls at his feet and grabs his ankles.

“Please don’t take her from me. I just found her.”

I giggle when he pulls her up, hugs her tight to his chest and kisses her cheek.

“Go home, Mira. Have a few drinks, let your husband make you forget today and come back tomorrow with a clear head. Em, you and me in my office, babe. We’re having lunch and then you’re taking me through everything you’ve found, step by step. We might even have to burn the midnight oil,” he drawls, winking and making Mira gag.

“Is that code for office sex?” she mutters, drying her eyes and grabbing her bag while Colt calls down to his driver to meet Mira out front.

“Nope, that’s me being a pig and telling my girl that I have this fantasy that involves my desk, her and the glasses she hides in her desk drawer,” he explains, making me flush and want to disappear.

“Christ! I can’t believe you’re taking this so well. I thought you’d at least give me one of your famous snarls and threaten to make me work through the holidays.”

“Mi, I can’t blame this shit on you. Turner and his little sidekick shouldn’t be anywhere near this stuff so it’s just pointing to the fact that the two of them and Norman are in cahoots. Look on the bright side, sweetheart, Jameson is under contract so were not going to lose. They’ll pay or hit the road. They can’t afford to go shopping for another company so we’re not in shit yet. Emma and I know what to do from here, we just need to get all our ducks in a row. Stop worrying and go home, Mi. That’s an order.”

She ducks her head, a small smile playing at the edges of her mouth, and scuttles out with a wave. I look at Colton with my jaw hanging open and gasp into his mouth when he grabs me and kisses me hard, his tongue shooting in for a quick sweep before he releases me and groans.

“Lunch, work, sex.”

I try not to grin and gather my files, keeping my head down as we walk through the office and to the elevator. Colton doesn’t say a word, just stands quietly until we’re inside and the doors close, then he’s on me so fast I squeak and moan when he kisses me, his hands gripping my head to hold me still.

This kiss is not about passion or comfort, I know those kisses, it’s about claiming me and showing me that I am his.

“You walk tall beside me, Emma, no matter what those assholes say or what they think. You and me, we’re together and I am proud of you.” He growls, kissing me hard one last time while my head reels.

Shit. Dammit.

“I’m proud to be with you, Colt. I love you. Don’t doubt it, please. I just, I’m not going to suddenly become another person,” I explain feeling like hell because I think I hurt him.

He sighs, shoves a hand through his hair and guides me into his office, his personal assistant jumping to it when he barks a food order at her and tacks on an order for cake. For me.

I follow, not saying anything as he closes the door and shows me to the couch against a wall. I’ve never been in here, not his personal sanctum and I take a minute to look around.

One whole wall is glass, that expensive kind that allows a clear view of the sky but doesn’t allow harsh sun to filter in. The walls are a deep grey and the carpet is a darker shade. The couch I lower myself onto is black and soft and the table and desk are a dark wood, heavy and grandiose.

Colton sits too, relieving me of the files before turning me to look at him.

“I don’t like that you can’t be confident with other people and I am sorry that I snapped at you, but I don’t want you to ever feel like you can’t look at those bastards and spit in their eye. They’re nothing compared to you.”

“I love that you think so, Colt, but that’s just not me. Not yet. I feel stronger every day, because of you. Being with you is so easy. I never thought, not once, that I would ever meet someone and even more that I would ever be completely vulnerable and yet feel strong with a man. You make me stronger, happier, all the good ‘ers’ in life but I’m still me. Yeah, I was shy, I am still shy. Just not with you,” I say, smiling when he takes a deep breath and looks at me in a way that makes me feel like I hung the moon and stars.

When he does, when his eyes go all soft and sweet like that, I have giddy hope that he’ll say the words one day because it’s not possible for him not to feel love when he’s this sweet and vulnerable.

My guess is that he won’t let himself because he’s afraid. If that’s the case, I’m counting on myself to set a good example and teach him what it is to truly love.

“It makes me feel ten feet tall when you say shit like that, baby.” He growls and I gasp when he grips my hand and pulls it into his lap.

He’s hard, throbbing through his slacks, the heat soaking into my hand through the fabric making the tingle I’d suppressed this morning spring back to life.

My breasts tighten and my sex goes slick and tightens up as if it knows what it wants.

“You do this to me, Emma. Just a look and I’m so ready for you it pains me.”

“Me too.” I breathe, shivering when he grins.

“Lunch, work, sex,” he reminds me, making me giggle and groan at the same time. “Told you we should have played hooky again.”

“If we’d played hooky I wouldn’t have found possible embezzlement on one of the biggest accounts and poor Mira would still be yanking her hair out. Work, Mr. James, and then I will personally make you love that desk,” I promise, blushing when he gives me a toothy grin and hot eyes.

“Work and then I am making love to you until you scream and leave scratch marks down my back,” he retorts.

The assistant, Harmony – yeah, I know - comes back with two BLTs and two slices of cake that are huge. I grin when he automatically removes the tomato from mine and shoves it on his, shoving his lettuce my way because he knows I like it.

We eat with me smiling at him shyly and he makes sure that I finish it all, including half the slice of cake he ordered for me. I feel replete when we’re done and I realize as I take the files and pull the laptop he gives me closer, Colton takes care of me.

He makes sure I eat and sleep, even if he’s still wide awake and obviously aroused. He tries to buy me nice things because he wants me to have them. He forces me to drive to work with him because he doesn’t want me to get hurt by some maniac on the public transport system.

Do I really need him to say he loves me? Probably, but if he doesn’t do it right now it’s enough that he shows me.

We work together companionably for the next three hours. Colton reads through everything I have in rough and I put together the evidence and a presentation that he’s intending to show to the Jameson people and the cops.

Never let it be said that he’s heartless, his treatment of Mira proves he isn’t, but my boyfriend is no push over either and I shiver slightly when he tells me his intentions to have the criminal parties prosecuted.

“You about done, Em?”

I look up from the screen, my eyes hurting because I refused to bring my glasses on principle to see him lounging back on the couch, his jacket and tie gone with his sleeves rolled up.

What I thought was three hours is obviously much more because the sky outside is dark and the sounds of the office are no longer a din but silence.

“What time is it?”

“Just after eight, babe, time to pack this up and go home. We can get back to it in the morning. Just give me what you’ve got to lock in the safe and we’re leaving.”

I hand it all over and wait while he puts things away and then he takes my hand and pulls me under his arm. The ride downstairs has me leaning into him while he nuzzles my neck and then we’re in the car and on the way, even when I protest that I need to go home for clothes.

“Already had Harm go over and get your stuff from Buck. He says hi, by the way.”