PRESSING MY LIPS TO THE warm skin beside her belly button, I kissed her and lifted myself from her body. Snuggling wasn’t my thing, although, it was bit overwhelming how good it was to be with her—to feel her against me. It was better with her than any other woman, and we hadn’t even fucked yet.
I’d known from the first moment I laid eyes on her, she was going to be perfection… and she didn’t disappoint. The problem now was I couldn’t get enough of her. I wanted to be around her and hear her voice, all the fucking time. I didn’t know how to handle it. I didn’t know what it meant. I just knew everything about her was addicting, and it was too much for me.
“Come on. I’ll walk you to the car,” I said once we adjusted our clothes.
It was the last thing I wanted to do. I didn’t want her to leave. I wanted to take her to my apartment and spend the night between her legs, but that wasn’t a possibility.
I wasn’t going to break the rules, and having sex in my apartment was one of the rules. Vick was right. It was different with Jessica, but I had to stop it. I couldn’t allow it to be different—at least any more than it already was.
“I’ll see you soon,” Jessica smiled up at me, before climbing into the back of the car.
I nodded, and contained the grin pulling at my lips.
Under no circumstances was I going to turn into a weak fuck. I would never become one of those pathetic pussy-whipped men. She was not going to change me.
I watched her go until I couldn’t see the tail lights any more. Walking back inside, I headed over to the VIP section, where I spent the rest of the night getting fucked up with a few celebrity playboys.
For the next three days, I didn’t text or visit Jessica, even though it killed me. I buried myself in paperwork and meetings, and tried not to think about her. I could have met with another one of my girls, but I wasn’t feeling it. My balls were in a bunch, and my mind was a mess.
“You’ve been an asshole this week,” Vick said, tossing a stack of papers on my desk. “This girl has your dick twisted, Sebastian. I think she’s a bad idea.”
“Tell me how you really feel,” I responded without looking up.
“Whatever,” she spat on her way out the door.
She was right. I was turning into a fucking head case. The club was always my number one priority, but since I’d met Jessica, it had become an afterthought. I spent less time downstairs, and more time with her. The mountain of paper on my desk that hadn’t been done was proof of that.
Pushing the papers away, I stood and snatched my jacket from the back of the chair. The last few days had been hell, and it was time I had a little surprise visit.
The streets were slick with rain. The tires on my car slid when I took corners, going too fast for the weather.
The doorman outside of Jessica’s building nodded to me as I passed. It was embarrassing to think, but I was actually getting excited to see her. An involuntary smile tugged at my mouth when I got on the elevator, but the minute the door opened to her top floor condo, the smile slipped from my face.
Jessica was sitting on the floor next to the elevator, crying. Her eyes were red and swollen as she swiped at her running nose with a tissue.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
She looked up at me and opened her mouth to speak. Instead, a sob exploded from her pouty lips and she covered her face with her hands. Leaning down, I slipped my arms beneath her and picked her up from the floor. She wrapped her arms around me and buried her face into my neck.
I wasn’t one to stick around for tear-filled drama. Again, it was something different with her. Stepping into her room, I placed her on the edge of the bed. I plucked the pieces of wet hair from her face, as I kneeled in front of her.
“Tell me what it is.”
She sniffed. “It’s Kyle. He went to that program at the art institute an hour ago. He’s going to be gone most of the summer.”
“I thought that’s what you wanted?” I asked confused.
“It is, but it doesn’t mean I’m not going to miss him. I’ve taken care of him since he was practically a baby. I’m not sure how it’s going to be with him gone. He’s all I have.”
The urge to tell her she had me was strong, but the forbidden words choked me when they got stuck in my throat.
Instead, I fingered a strand of her hair and tucked it behind her ear.
“Where’s the art institute located? Is it very far?”
“It’s about five hours away, but he’s going to be staying there all summer instead of staying with me.”
My smile returned. Even though she was crying and upset, I laughed. Her head popped up and she looked at me like I was nuts. I felt crazy. She was making me insane.
“Are you seriously laughing at me right now?” she asked angrily.
“Yes. You realize he’s close enough for you to visit him, right?”
She sniffed and used her tissue to wipe. With her red eyes and ratty hair she should have looked a mess, but it was the total opposite. She looked soft, and full of emotions I’d never understand. She looked real—alive. I envied her ability to feel so deeply for someone, but felt sorry for her at the same time. Feeling things for people meant having the ability to feel pain as well.
“I know that. I’m just being dramatic. I’m a woman, I’m allowed.”
She smiled through her tears and as cliché as it sounds, I lost my breath. It was like a punch to the lungs—an exhale of the man I thought I was and a rebirth of some new person who felt things for the woman in front of him.
Using my thumb, I captured a stray tear as it melted down her cheek.
“Thanks for being here, Sebastian,” she whispered with her head down.
Lifting her face to meet mine again, I grinned at her. “I don’t usually stick around for a woman’s tears. I think I’ve earned something. What are you going to give me?”
She visibly swallowed and her eyes widened. “What do you want?”
Already I was thinking of the different positions I wanted to put her in. What position could get me deeper inside her perfect little pussy, but I knew I had to take it slow.
Tilting her head up higher, I took my time, skimming her lips with mine and feeling their warmth. I continued to do that until the moment I knew she wanted me to kiss her. She exhaled and closed her eyes and that was all the invite I needed.
I nibbled at her lips before pressing mine to hers tightly. A sweet noise rushed past her lips and vibrated my mouth. I kissed her deep, tasting her on my tongue and memorizing the moment for later days.
Her fingers worked their way into the hair at the back of my neck as she formed her body to mine. She fit as if she was made for me. It was the second time I’d ever kissed a woman without the intention of fucking her. Both times being with her.
She broke the kiss and smiled back at me. Capturing my cheek with her soft palm, I lost myself in her green orbs. “You’re amazing, Sebastian,” she whispered.
And then, I saw it. The thing which told me my time with one of my ladies was up—the thing that usually sent me running for the hills. It was in her eyes, the way she stared at me with an awestruck expression. She was falling for me. She’d broken one of my sacred rules.
The strangest things happened in that very moment. First, I had absolutely no desire to run from her. If anything, I wanted to bathe in her expression and celebrate her feelings for me. And second, I almost asked her what her real name was. I wanted to know her, who she was, what she liked. But worst of all, I wanted to keep her.
Instead, I pulled back, like her words were a slap to the face. Her brows pinched in confusion. I stood, smoothing the wrinkles from my pants.
“Our time here is up.”
I wanted to say more—anything that would hurt her and change her opinion of me. I wasn’t ready to let her go yet. I’d only had a taste of what she had to offer sexually, and now there were these forbidden feelings bouncing around that I didn’t understand.
Instead of pushing and saying hurtful things, I turned and left her sitting on her bed with a confused expression.
I had some thinking to do. I needed to figure out what the hell was going on with me and I needed to fix it fast. Sebastian Black didn’t get pussy-whipped, especially before he had the pussy.
Fuck me. Was that even possible?
AS SOON AS I GOT back to my office, I pulled my book out and flipped through the names. I knew exactly what I needed.
Wilma and Betty.
They were sure to take my mind off of the crazy bullshit currently taking over my life. I could already hear their moans and feel them wrapped around my hard cock.
I pulled out my phone and sent them a text, instructing them to meet in our usual room. As quickly as I stepped into my office, I stepped out.
The ride to the hotel was a blur. I drove on autopilot.
“Hello, Mr. Black,” the front desk clerk said, smiling as he held out my room card.
I nodded. I didn’t have time to chat with anyone. My cock was on a mission. I needed disconnected sex—no feelings, no bullshit.
When I stepped into the room, the girls had already started without me. Both were naked and making out on the bed. Peeling my jacket off, I undid my tie and stepped to the side of the bed. Wilma turned her attention to me, and began to unbutton my pants. She looked up at me with a seductive smile, pulling my pants and boxers down around my hips.
I was limp.
“What do we have here? This is unacceptable,” she cooed.
Wrapping an experienced hand around my cock, she began to work it. I closed my eyes and tried to just be in the moment, but all I saw was fiery hair and green eyes. I shook my head, trying to get the image out of my mind. No matter how many times I pushed her away, she kept coming back.
“Come on, Sebastian. Give us what we want,” Betty said, licking her lips as she leaned down and took Wilma’s nipple in her mouth.
Absolutely nothing was happening downstairs. My balls were tight and ached for release. I wanted to fuck so bad I couldn’t stand it, but I wasn’t able to get hard.
I smacked Wilma’s hand away and gripped myself. I began to stroke with a mission. I had a point to prove, and if that meant I had to pump my own dick until it chaffed I’d fucking do it.
Ten minutes later, even with an expert hand and a view of Wilma tongue-fucking Betty, there was nothing.
“I’m sorry girls. Today’s not the day.”
They continued as I dressed and left the room. I closed the door on Betty’s moans.
There was no denying it. Jessica was changing me somehow. It was new, and I hated it, but there was nothing I could do. I was officially fucked.
She needed to go.