“WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG with you, Roz? You’re like Night of the Living Dead over there.” Trish said, licking banana frozen yogurt from her spoon.
I stared down at my cup and dug my spoon into it over and over again, turning my yogurt into mush, but never taking a bite. “I’m just tired.”
Tired was an understatement. Since the moment Sebastian asked me to leave his apartment, I’d been a nervous wreck. There was no telling when I’d be kicked to the curb, but more than anything, I missed him. If I could go back and change the moment when things shifted between us, I would have never left his bed.
I could have stayed Jessica forever. I was willing to do that for him. I didn’t care what that said about me. From the second I left the club, I knew I was in love with him.
After trying to have a semi-normal day at the mall with Trish, I called Mr. Martin and had him pick me up and take me back to my condo. Seeing as though he still answered my calls, things couldn’t have been that bad, right? If Sebastian was really done with me, would his driver still be driving me around?
I moped around the condo for the past week, eating way too much junk food, and waiting for the sound of my phone to buzz or the elevator doors to beep. And still, there was nothing.
I talked on the phone with Kyle a few times, and he made me feel better. I was glad to know he was having a blast and making friends at the program. At least he was happy. I just wasn’t sure his happiness would remain once Sebastian dropped me like a bad habit.
I was approved for financial aid and got signed up for some online classes, which was a good step in the right direction, but I needed to start job searching again.
I continued to put in applications to places within walking distance, as I waited to hear back from one of them. If I had a job, maybe this whole situation wouldn’t be so bad.
No matter how many times I told myself this, I knew that was a lie. Job or no job, I would still miss Sebastian. It was going to hurt badly when things were officially done between the two of us.
I was coming out of a jewelry store around the corner from my condo, when I spotted Mr. Martin sitting in the car across the street, waiting. Looking both ways, I ran across the street and was a few feet away from the car, when I saw Sebastian coming from a large unmarked building.
He was wearing a black suit, fit to perfection, and a pair of dark aviator glasses. He looked so sexy I almost fell to my knees and begged him not to leave me. I closed my eyes and thought about the way he’d touched me—the things he did to my body.
When I opened my eyes again, he was standing frozen next to the car, with his shades off and his hand holding onto the handle. He was staring at me, an angry expression on his face.
I held up my hand and sent him an awkward smile. It was a stupid thing to do, but I was so happy to see him, I didn’t want to hide it. I was done hiding the way I felt.
He continued to stare for a while longer, until he slipped his shades back into place, and disappeared into the car.
I stood there in total shock as the car pulled away from the curb and disappeared into the traffic.
My heart ached. It was just too much. I barely held back the tears on the walk back to the condo, breaking down as soon as I stepped off the elevator.
Spending the night alone, I ate ice cream and watched old movies. There was a brief debate on whether or not to call Trish, but I didn’t feel like explaining the condo or anything else. It was better if she stayed in the dark about my life, especially because it involved her boss.
I stared down at my cell phone, willing him to text or call, but there was nothing. I fell asleep on the couch with my phone in my hand, an empty ice cream carton on the table, puffy eyes, and the TV on.
The sound of gunshots woke me and I sat straight up in bed. It was a horrible sound. It hurt my ears and made a strange ache twist in my stomach. I gripped my sheets with sweaty palms and that’s when I heard the firm footfalls on the hardwood outside my bedroom. Whoever it was, they were running. The sounds of them running down the stairs and out the back door, echoed in my room.
Kyle’s loud crying sounded from his nursery and filled the deadly silence of the night. I was too afraid to get up, but once his cries got louder, I tiptoed to my bedroom door. Pulling the door open slowly so it didn’t squeak, I tried to listen for any strange sounds.
The area outside my room was pitch-black. On silent feet, I ran across the hall to Kyle’s nursery, but my eyes glanced into my parent’s room and I froze. Terror was a punch to my chest, when lying there on the floor, in the light shining from their bathroom, was my father. He was in a puddle of blood, and his eyes were wide open, staring back at me. He wasn’t moving, he wasn’t breathing.
In shock, I turned away from Kyle’s room and started toward my dad. It was then I saw my mother’s body. I gasped when I saw her killer still standing above her.
My eyes dropped to my mother’s lifeless body and I made an involuntary move toward her, but her killer jumped to his feet and I froze, not taking another step.
The intruder’s breathing became louder, and mine seemed to stop completely. The stranger’s eyes connected with mine. Time stopped as we stared at each other. Fear laced his expression and it confused me.
The harsh sound of his panting filled the room. It looked like he was debating his next move. His eyes moved to the door behind me. Shifting on his feet, the light caught something in his hand. It was my mother’s locket, which had pictures of me and Kyle inside. It wasn’t worth much, which made it strange that the guy was taking it, but then I looked around the room and saw their TV was missing.
The killer left my mother, necklace in hand, and ran toward me. I stopped breathing and dropped to my knees. Just when he got close to me and I was sure he was going to kill me too, he ran past me and down the stairs. The back door slammed. And then, even though I could hear Kyle crying, it was eerily silent.
I WOKE UP IN BED, with my pajamas on and a blanket draped over me. The sun from the windows blinded me when I opened my eyes.
A sound from inside the condo startled me and I reached over to my bedside table. Still in a sleep-induced haze, I pulled open the drawer, and grabbed the gun Sebastian bought me.
Walking toward the noise on quiet feet, I raised the gun, ready to shoot. Making it to the corner of the kitchen, I took a deep breath and tried to steel my nerves.
When I stepped around the corner, I came face to chest with a large man. Without thought, I pulled the trigger.
Nothing happened.
I looked up and Sebastian was standing before me, looking down with wild eyes. He reached out and took the gun from me.
“Holy shit. You could have killed me, Roz.” He set the gun on the counter beside us. “Thank God you had the safety on. Speaking of which, you have to make sure the safety is off before you use it.”
He turned and walked away from me, and back to the stove where he was cooking. I’m not sure how I missed the smell of bacon wafting all around.
“You’re here,” I stated the obvious.
“Yes I am,” he grinned at me, as if I hadn’t just tried to kill him. “A ‘good morning’ would be nice.”
I was still in shock by the fact that I’d almost blown a hole in his chest.
“Good morning,” I said slowly.
“Come sit down and eat some breakfast,” he said, setting a plate on the counter full of bacon and eggs.
“You made me breakfast?”
“It was the least I could do.”
I had a million questions I wanted to ask, but I didn’t want to jinx the moment. Instead, I sat on the stool in front of my plate and started to pick at the bacon.
“Eat. We have a lot to talk about,” he said, taking a big bite of bacon and chewing with a smile on his face.
I couldn’t wait.
“I’m sorry, Sebastian. I didn’t think. It just came out,” I said.
“I didn’t come here to talk about that.”
“Oh.” Maybe I had jumped the gun, thinking he was actually back.
“I came here today hoping you’d tell me your whole name.”
“No,” I said sternly. “I don’t want you to push me away. I’ll stay your Jessica.”
There I’d said it. I showed my desperation and while I should have been completely embarrassed by it, I wasn’t.
“So you’re perfectly okay sleeping with a man who calls you by another woman’s name forever?”
“Well maybe not forever, but…” I stopped. “What do you mean forever?”
Sebastian never said the word forever. I seriously doubted he even thought about the following week when it came to his girls.
“I mean, I went a week without you, and I’m not sure I ever want to go that long again.”
He moved around the counter and stood next to me.
“Are you saying what I think you’re saying, Mr. Black?” I asked playfully.
He looked down at me with a soft expression, before pressing his lips to mine. “Tell me your name,” he said against my lips.
Pulling back, I let my eyes devour his face. If it was possibly going to be the last time I saw him, I wanted to take it all in.
“Rosslyn. My name’s Rosslyn Harris.”
He closed his eyes and swallowed hard before pulling me closer. “A beautiful name for a beautiful girl.”
“You think I’m beautiful?” I asked as I batted my lashes at him.
“You know I do, smartass. And what makes it even better, you’re all mine.”
“Again, are you saying what I think you’re saying, Mr. Black?”
“I don’t know, Miss Rosslyn Harris. What is it you think I’m saying?”
It felt good to hear him say my name. After being called Jessica for so long, it was nice to finally be acknowledged as myself.
“It sounds to me like you’re saying you’re prepared to throw away you’re little black book.”
He threw his head back and laughed out loud before leaning down and kissing me softly. I lost my fingers in the soft hair that touched the back of his neck and he filled his hands with my hips. Pulling away, he smiled down at me before kissing the tip of my nose sweetly.
“What black book? I own no such thing,” he grinned.