Chapter Nine
Adam
Monday
What the…
I still couldn’t wrap my head around it, even hours later. Dinner had been served and eaten, everyone was sort of managing to get along through the tension, which was about as good as my family could ask for…but something felt deadly wrong.
Why did Lindsey agree to go to the barbecue?
That was it – that was the issue. I just couldn’t get it. Why the hell would she put herself in a position where she had to go out with me again? She’d already done what we agreed, she was at this meal, that was all that she needed to do for the cash… So why put herself through more?
Maybe I could assume that she didn’t really care, that she had just agreed to shut my family up and that she expected me to make an excuse later, but I didn’t think that was the case. I also didn’t think that she said it to expect more money, either. It seemed, weirdly, that she was doing it to be nice.
Nice I barely understood, especially when I couldn’t work out the motivation behind it.
I wanted to ask Lindsey more, but we hadn’t been given a moment alone. She had spent time charming my mother, winning over my father, and even causing my brother to look at me with the green-eyed monster behind his gaze. Every time she laid her hand on top of mine, I could see him glancing towards Helen, who hadn’t given him a scrap of attention all night long.
At least there was some good to come from tonight.
“…and now, the award that we’ve all been waiting for.” I forced my eye roll to only be a small one when I knew that the moment was upon us. My chest tightened, my stomach twisted up in knots, my heart beat faster. “The honorary award for business.”
I tuned out and turned to look at Lindsey. Admiring her beauty and trying to work out what the hell was going on behind her gaze was preferable to listening to some sap talk up my dad. None of the people in the room knew this man like I did. I wanted to get up there and tell them how he really was, but what would be the point? Who gave a shit? I leaned onto my elbow and stared at her, wondering who she really was. Really, she was nothing more than an enigma…
I had to drag myself from those thoughts when the clapping rang out around the room. I forced my hands to bang together so I didn’t come across as the bitter, twisted pig that I kinda was.
I froze when I noticed that it wasn’t just Dad standing up on the stage. Brandon was there, too, standing next to him as if he belonged there. As if he was part of the reason my father was so successful. His grinning smug face burned into my brain and sent anger cascading through me. It dizzied me and made a red mist descend in front of my vision. I could barely contain myself. I shot my mother a look, but she refused to meet my gaze.
“Thank you so much for this award,” Dad boomed out like the arrogant son of a bitch he was. “It means so much. To me and my son.” As he turned to smile at Brandon my knuckles turned white. I was his son too, why the fuck couldn’t he see that? Why couldn’t he see that I had my own worth? Just because I didn’t meet his expectations, didn’t make me a bad person. “We’ve built up this company and made it a success together.”
I pushed my chair back, getting myself ready to stand. I wasn’t quite sure what I was going to do when I raised myself upwards, but I felt certain that it wouldn’t be good. Then I felt some soft skin brushing against my hand, and I glanced down to gaze at Lindsey who was looking up at me pleadingly. The woman didn’t know me at all, we were virtually strangers aide from a few facts that we’d both tried to memorize, yet she seemed to see through me in a way that no one else could. Her boring stare halted me in my tracks and made me think for a second about what I was about to do.
“Do you want to get out of here?” I gasped through the inner pain. I couldn’t stand remaining here, my father had clearly made his point. He didn’t need me here anymore than I wanted to be here.
“Yes,” Lindsey agreed, standing up. “Come on, let’s go now.”
I started to walk, but didn’t get too far because I realized I was alone. I turned back to see Lindsey saying what appeared to be a thoughtful goodbye to my mother. That touched me actually. I was about ready to leave without even thinking about Mom, which I’m sure she would have understood since I’d acted that way before, but Lindsey wasn’t going to do that. Again, she was going above and beyond.
Eventually she came back to my side and she gave me a reassuring smile. As she linked her arm through mine my chest weirdly warmed up. I didn’t feel quite as shitty as I did just a few moments ago. There was something reassuring about her presence that I liked more than I originally thought that I would.
“Shall we go and get a drink somewhere?” she asked with a playful upwards curl to her lip. “I don’t know about you, but I think this dress really needs to see the inside of a dive bar.”
The unexpected joke made me laugh. She was somehow making this whole drama seem like it was much less of a problem without really trying. “Sure, dive bar it is.”
We walked down the street, past the much emptier red carpet. For such a boring event, the press didn’t bother to stick around, which made me much happier. At least my dad’s glory was over now. There wouldn’t be more to swell his head.
“Did you have any idea where you want to go?”
Lindsey grabbed my arm and tugged me into a bar just around the corner. It wasn’t exactly dive bar material, but it wasn’t the sort of place that sold Don Peringon, either. It was a place that neither of us fit in, which was weirdly perfect. “Let’s go here, this will do.”
I headed to the bar as Lindsey went to get us a seat. I’d seen her drinking wine at the meal but I wanted something different. I wanted to separate us both from the night, so I ordered some funky-looking cocktails instead. I had no idea what was in them that made them such a funny green color, but I was more than willing to go with it.
“Ah nice,” Lindsey’s eyes lit up. “That looks delicious.” She sucked back the drink rapidly and smiled. “Thank you.”
I took a sip myself, getting some Dutch courage. I’d parked the car safely so it didn’t matter if I left it until tomorrow morning. I could have a couple of drinks and not worry about it. “So,” I declared with gusto. “I have to ask you, Lindsey, it’s been bugging me. Why the hell did you agree to come to the barbecue?” She shrugged and didn’t give me any answer which meant I needed to probe her further. “Did you do it for money? Because we didn’t agree to that.”
Her eyes flashed, that anger came back tenfold which meant I knew I was in for a truth bomb. “Because your father seems like much more of an asshole than you made him out to be.” Her mouth opened as she realized that she might just have overstepped the mark. “I didn’t mean that in a bitchy way…”
“No, I know. I get that,” I sighed loudly. “He’s not a pleasant man, so why do you want to spend more time with him?”
“I don’t know, maybe to spend time with…” She didn’t finish that sentence, but we both knew that she meant me. It was a weird feeling, and I didn’t know how I felt about it. “Anyway.” She changed the subject rapidly. “Why don’t you just get a job if you want your father to respect you? He might be a douche bag, but that’s all he seems to want.”
I glowered and pushed my glass away. I was planning on getting tipsy with Lindsey and maybe having some fun with her to make up for the shitty night that I’d had, but now she had me pissed off. I didn’t want to think about that sort of stuff, not now.
“Come on,” I said standing up. “I think it’s time to go. I’ll drive you home.”
The drive to Lindsey’s home was another quiet one. She could tell that she’d upset me and didn’t know how to fix it. I wasn’t sure how she could, either; her comment and assumption about my life was totally unfair. She assumed, just like everyone else did, that I was a spoiled, good for nothing, rich kid. I was so much more than that, I just wished that someone would see that.
When I pulled up outside her home, I huffed and twisted around to face her. “I guess I’ll give you a call about the barbecue then. You can always text me if you change your mind.” I no longer wanted her to come, in fact it would have been a good thing if this was the last time I ever saw her, but I didn’t want her to know that I was pissed. “Maybe you’ve changed your mind now?”
“Nope,” she replied, popping the p. “I’m happy to come if you want me.”
Why did it feel like we were in the middle of a stand off? I narrowed my eyes as it seemed that this was a game that I was losing badly? “Okay fine.” I reached into the glove compartment and pulled out a pre-written check for fifteen thousand dollars. It was more than she was expecting, I felt sure of it, but when the night had begun I held the expectation that we were actually going to have fun.
As I sat there feeling about two feet tall, I wondered if three hundred dollars might have been more appropriate.
“R…right, thanks,” she stammered, finally off kilter. At least I had that. “I appreciate it. I guess I’ll see you soon.”
As she slid out the car and she walked into her apartment block I felt overcome with sadness. I didn’t like the fact that Lindsey had ruined all her niceness all night long with that one stupid comment. Why did everything good turn to shit? Maybe I just didn’t deserve happiness.
I yanked my phone out my pocket when it beeped, for some reason thinking that it was Lindsey, but then I noticed my mother’s name on the screen. I opened up the message anxiously, wondering how much shit I was in.
‘Hi Adam, thanks for coming tonight; it was great to see you as always.’ No mention of my dad being an ass or my storm out. ‘Lindsey seems like a lovely woman, I like her a lot. I’m looking forward to seeing her at the weekend.’
Well, that was just freaking great, wasn’t it? Now I couldn’t be the one to call it off, not unless I wanted to upset my mother. It looked like I was going to have to spend more time with Lindsey whether I liked it or not. I was going to have to plaster the mask on my face and act like she wasn’t a know it all bitch.
‘Thanks, Mom. Looking forward to it. See you then.’