Chapter 15

Jason

The sun through the windows seeped into my closed eyelids, waking me before Jana had even begun to stir. I laid there staring out at the beautiful Massachusetts morning, feeling like today was the day. Last night I had made love to Jana for the first time, and I put everything I had into it. I thought if I expressed it then maybe it would come out in words but I let her fall to sleep without saying it out loud. It was our last few hours on vacation, and I wanted her to feel special before drudging back to the grind of life. Slowly I crept out of bed, standing still next to it as she rolled over and back to sleep. I dressed and tiptoed to the kitchen, realizing I had forgotten to get the fridge stocked for the weekend.

I grabbed the keys off the table and quietly left the house, walking happily through the yard and to the garage. There was a coffee shop just fifteen minutes from the house that served amazing breakfast so I figured I would pick us up some food and have a nice beginning to our day on the patio. The sun was warmer today, and I left my jacket in the car as I got out and walked into the shop. It was busy since this was one of the most popular times of year in Martha’s Vineyard. I waited patiently memorizing my order and then placed it with the smiling girl behind the counter. Small town life was really enticing, and for the first time in my life, I didn’t want to rush back to the city.

As I waited for the food and coffee, I sat in the corner and watched the other people milling around. There were families, couples, old people, and even some young hipsters out enjoying the fall weather. I smiled at this one older couple as the man, wrinkled and slightly bent over, took his wife’s hand and guided her through the crowd. I stood up from my table and motioned for them to take my seats. The gentlemen shook my hand, and the woman smiled kindly as I pulled her chair out for her. I stepped back and watched at the husband kissed his wife gently on the cheek. That was the kind of love that I wanted, the kind that lasted through a life time, and probably beyond.

I was drawn from my daydream when they called my name at the front. I collected the jug of coffee and bag of breakfast foods and headed out of the café. As I drove back, I couldn’t help but roll down the windows and take in the fresh morning air. God knows I probably breathed enough smog in the city for a thousand lifetimes. My lungs weren’t even really sure what to do with all of this fresh air. I pulled into the drive of the house slowly, hoping that I wasn’t waking Jana. I wanted to get all the food out and ready before she woke up.

I tiptoed through the house, carefully pulling out plates, mugs, and platters and arranging them on the table. One by one I put the bagels, croissants, and fruit arrangements out. Just as I finished pouring both cups of coffee Jana appeared around the corner, clutching her robe closed and smiling sleepily. The smile on my face must have been huge because she giggled as she walked over, leaning up on her tiptoes to kiss my face. I pulled the chair out for her and pushed it in as she sat, handing her a cloth napkin before walking around the table and sitting down.

“You know you are going to spoil me and then you’re stuck doing these things forever,” she said laughing. “Well, at least as long as I keep you around.”

“Hey,” I said faking a pout. She stuck her tongue out at me and sipped her coffee.

“Ahh, I just don’t want to leave, it is so beautiful here,” she said looking out the window. “It’s like living in a fairytale. I keep expecting to see bushy tailed bunnies and deer grazing in the fields.”

“I mean I can make that happen,” I said taking a bite of a croissant.

“No, let’s leave the woodland creatures for the next step in our relationship,” she said chuckling.

I put the croissant down on my plate and took in a deep breath. I had to tell her now. I had to put myself out of my own misery. The worst that could happen is she doesn’t feel the same, but if I never do it, I’ll never know.

“Hey, are you okay? If you want woodland creatures by all means,” she said looking at my change in facial expression with concern.

“No,” I said shaking my head and grabbing her hand. “Come with me.”

“Okay,” she sang as I pulled her out the doors and into the fresh morning air.

“I have to tell you something,” I said nervously.

“Oh, god,” she said pulling her hand back. “Please don’t break up with me here. You’ll ruin the whole state for me.”

“No,” I said shaking my head. “I’m not breaking up with you; I love you.”

“What?” The look on her face was pure shock.

“I love you, Jana,” I repeated. “I’ve known it for a while now, but I wanted it to be perfect. Ever since the first time I met you I wanted to be with you. You make me want to be a better man. More than that, you changed me from the inside. It’s not a sacrifice to be the man you need me to be; it’s a necessity. I have to be the man you need.”

“Wow,” she said her mouth hanging open.

“I understand if you aren’t there yet,” I rambled not wanting to pressure her. “I just had to lay the cards on the tab…”

She reached forward and put her hands on my cheeks, pulling me in hard and planting one right on my lips. I could feel her mouth curving up into a smile as we stood there embraced. She pulled her face back and stared into my eyes.

“Jason I love you too,” she whispered. “I think I have for a very long time but was so afraid to admit it. But I can’t hold back any longer either; I love you.”

I pulled her in and hugged her for as long as I could. Knowing that we were in the same place, feeling the same thing, shot me straight to cloud nine. This girl was the girl for me; I knew it deep inside. My father always told me lightning would strike when I met the one and let me tell you I am burnt to a crisp from this girl.

“Let’s call out from work tomorrow,” I whispered. “Let’s stay just one more day.”

“I was thinking the same exact thing,” she laughed. “I want to see this all over again, but this time with the love of my life holding my hand.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” I replied.

And that is exactly what we did. I changed the flight schedule, called Ryan, and gave Jana some privacy to call her boss and come up with a convincing lie. When we were done, and all the plans were set we walked out into the early afternoon air and sat down in the reclining patio chair. She snuggled in next to me laying her head against my chest. We watched as the clouds shifted through the sky and the leaves floated from the trees, painting the ground with the vibrant colors of fall. It was the most perfect day I had ever had, and I knew I kept saying that, but it just kept getting better and better.

“Look,” Jana gasped sitting up straight. “I freaking bushy tailed bunny!”

She looked at me, and I looked at her, and we both burst out into laughter. Of all the things to happen at that moment, that was absolutely priceless. When we stopped laughing and gained control, she stood up and reached her hand out to me. I pulled myself from the chair and wrapped my arms around her, looking deep into her eyes. She absolutely took my breath away, and I knew I was a changed man. She reached up and ran her hands through my messy hair, smiling at me.

“Come on,” she said, pulling me toward the house. “Let’s get dressed and go for a drive. I’m ready to start that next step now.”

“A drive sounds nice but, I thought a hot shower might be even nicer,” I said tickling around the waist and running after her into the house. The next step could have been anything.