Chapter 3

Emmett

10 years later

I hadn’t planned on making a career of the military, and now that I had finally completed my engineering degree, I was making plans to end my commitment and not re-enlist. After seeing that it was a great big world for the past ten years, I was ready to find my place in it, a different place, one with no camouflage.

“Hey, Burke.” I heard the voice call behind me and turned just in time for Hardin to pull out a chair next to me.

“How’s it going, Hardin? What are you going to pretend you’re eating today?”

He put his plate down and then sat beside me. “Today, this is going to be a plate of barbecue ribs from this little place down in Texas called Carolina’s. She makes the best barbecue of anyone anywhere, and you can mark my words on that one. I used to have it every time I passed through that town.”

Hardin had never eaten a military meal in his life, at least in his head. He also got the best care packages from home and was never without a cookie in his pocket, even though he was one of the fittest soldiers I had ever known.

“I heard you finished your degree. That’s really great, man.” Hardin was always one to offer friendship and support, and he had been one of my oldest friends in the service. I’d met him my second year, and we’d been close since.

“Thanks. I hope I don’t have too many more days of this.” I pointed to my plate and wished I could daydream as vividly as my friend.

“What do you mean? Carolina’s is the best.” He picked up his fork and brought a lump of potatoes to his lips. “Best damned barbecue in Afghanistan.”

Hardin was always good for easing the stress of the day. After a moment, he put his fork down. “How do you do it, Burke? I mean, you finished your degree, man. That’s a wonderful accomplishment. You are the most disciplined person I know here, and that’s saying a lot in this place.”

“Thanks. I guess I don’t have much to distract me from my goals.” It had taken me a little bit of time to figure out what I wanted, and once I got things lined out, I spent all of my free time studying.

“That’s what I mean. Who you got to share your dreams with, man? You don’t have a woman back home, do you? Cause I never hear about your family or hear you talk about anyone in your life.”

“I haven’t had time. I’ve been studying and working.” Being deployed had made it hard to find company, too, and unlike some of the others who didn’t mind meaningless sex with whoever had a hole, I was more careful. Sure, I’d had my fair share of beautiful women since joining, but I didn’t have nearly as many crazy sexual adventures as some. Most were nothing more than a release, and some had actually been good friends to me since, but no one I’d confide in or share the good news with.

“Man, trust me. That shit ain’t much without someone to love at the end of the day. Someone to live for.” He had told me all about his wife and kids and how they meant everything to him. Not only had I seen all of his family pictures and the things his kids would send him—pictures they’d drawn and gifts they’d sent—but I’d also seen the smile on his face, and I envied him for having a family.

It wasn’t like I heard from Paul, although that really wasn’t his fault, seeing that he was still young when I left, and the last thing I’d heard from our father was that he stayed in trouble. That was the last time I’d spoken with our father, too. He had made it clear that with me walking out on the family, he didn’t want me to come back around. He called me a traitor to the family and had no regard for the fact that I was serving our country and hoping to better myself.

He’d never been much for encouragement. He hadn’t been there for any of my achievements, and I’d written him off years before the military came into my life. Yeah, that wasn’t the kind of story I wanted to tell Hardin. Not when his own family was so loving and seemingly perfect.

I couldn’t help but think of Autumn, and I wanted to tell him that I had loved once, and maybe I still did. I could tell him all about her and how wonderful she was. How I let her slip through my hands, and even worse, how she ended up marrying my best friend. I knew if I told him those things, I’d look like a real dumbass, and the last thing I wanted was to look stupid or be pitied. “I get what you’re saying, man, and I appreciate the encouragement, but I figure I have the rest of my life for love and relationships.”

Hardin shook his head. “Life’s short, man.”

The explosion happened so fast that neither of us had time to move. The wall across the room was turned to rubble, and part of the ceiling sagged above us as a cloud of dust and debris billowed around us. The place was going to come down any minute. We flipped our table over as some came to take cover, and others were doing the same thing to try and figure out their next move.

Everything was muffled, and I felt like I was vibrating, as if someone had rung my bell. The only clear sound was my heartbeat, which was pumping ninety to nothing. I tried to keep calm, not wanting to blackout from the rush, and my first instinct was to assess the situation.

“We’ve got to move.” I looked up, and the others were already starting to scatter. Some that had crouched down with us rushed for the door, but I wasn’t sure if that was going to take them anywhere.

“Come on, man. I’ve got too much to live for.” Hardin jumped up and ran for it, but I had to go after him to make sure we could find a clear, safe exit.

As soon as I got to the door, there was another explosion, and this time, the roof came down along with the other three walls. It crashed down on us, pushing us to the floor.

Hardin cried in pain, and the sound of agony filled the area, along with gunfire and smaller explosions in the distance. The air around us was filled with smoke. I bent down and cleared the rubble away from Hardin, only to find his leg was ripped open and bloody.

Other than a few cuts and scratches, I was fine. “I’ve got you, man.” I picked Hardin up and held him against me, and then we limped out away from the smoke, hoping to find shelter.

As the smoke cleared, I noticed the gunfire between our soldiers and the enemy was dangerously close, but if we didn’t move, we’d be dead soon enough.

I turned to Hardin, who was growing weaker by the second; his dark face, ashen. “We have to make it to the other side. Are you sure you’ll be able to go?”

“What other choice do I have? If we stay here, we’re dead.” Hardin ground his teeth so hard that I could see the muscles in his jaw twitch. Then, with what seemed like all his might, he shifted on the bad leg, and I worked to take the weight off of it. We waited until our men gave us the all-clear and darted across the area, tripping over debris until the ground became much clearer. Hardin went down, and I stopped to pick him up, draping his body over me as we got to the other side.

I never even felt the bullet as it went into my chest, but as soon as I put Hardin down, I collapsed. The last thing I remembered was turning cold and the taste of dirt and blood in my mouth.