Chapter 11

Elizabeth

What had I done? Confusion welled up inside me, and I couldn't seem to catch my breath. I walked toward the women’s locker room and ducked inside. Stephanie moved in behind me and let out a long sigh.

"It's not working," she growled, and ignored me as I stopped and stood numbly in the middle of the room.

I was dizzy, and if I didn't sit down soon I was going to hit the floor. Had I really just offered up my body to my mentor? I hadn't said body. I said time, attention, but not my body.

But you didn't deny him.

"Are you even listening?" She spun around and gave me a hard look before her face fell. "Oh shit. What's the matter? Is something wrong with your mom?"

She moved toward me and slid her hands up my arms as I shook my head.

"No. I just need to sit down. I don't feel so good." I let her help me to the nearest bench as I dropped down on it. In a matter of minutes I'd fucked up all I'd worked for. There was no way that Aiden was going to take me up on the offer. He would report me, and I would be out on my ass. Why hadn't I worded it differently? Had I meant to offer him my body?

No. Yes. Fuck.

I realized that Stephanie was squatting in front of me, jabbering on about something.

"What? I didn't hear you." I reached out and touched her shoulder. She was upset about something and needed me. "What's wrong?"

"Lizzy. You're what’s wrong. Shit. What's the matter? You look like you just found out that your mother died. Talk to me. You're scaring me."

A couple of other girls from the program gathered behind Steph, all of them looking genuinely concerned.

"I'm fine. There was just a lot of trauma in the E.R. this morning. I'm trying to shake off some of the stuff I had to see." I pressed my hands to my thighs and pulled my emotions back in. Now was not the time to freak out, especially not in front of everyone. They were waiting for someone to crack, and it sure as hell wasn't going to be me.

"You got to go into the E.R. this morning?" One of the taller girls standing close to us grumbled. "That's unfair. It's because Dr. Crawford let you, right?"

"Yeah. He wanted help, and I showed up at the right time, I guess." I tried to stand, and found that I was steady on my feet again. "I need to get out of here. You free?"

Stephanie stood with me, not letting go of my arms. Concern filled her face and she nodded. "I can be. Just let me check out with my mentor and I'll meet you at the door nearest the E.R., okay?"

"Yeah. I'm good. Just too much all of a sudden." I forced a tight smile and moved past her to walk to my locker. There was no way I was telling anyone about my conversation with Aiden. Not even Stephanie, and she knew everything about me.

I have to tell her. How else will I explain the money?

The chances of Dr. Crawford being serious about taking me up on the offer to use my body any time he wanted was slim. The larger concern at the moment was if he really did take me up on it. I wasn't a hooker or a slut. I'd slept with Jackson. I had no clue how to please a man like Aiden.

"Shit," I mumbled to myself as I stopped in front of my locker and closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. Maybe I needed to find a boyfriend and just explain my insanity to him. He wouldn’t want me if I was with someone else. We'd been through a lot in the E.R. just a few hours before. I was traumatized. Yeah. I could use that.

Just the memory of his hands on my face made my stomach tighten with desire. The kiss... fuck, the kiss... had been so good. It felt so right. I opened my eyes and took a shaky breath as his words echoed in my mind. He was dominant and demanding, and he wanted what he wanted... when he wanted it. My body pulsed with the strongest desire I'd ever felt.

"You okay?" One of the other girls touched my back, and I jerked away before offering her an apologetic smile.

"Yeah. Absolutely. Just too much drama for not getting any sleep last night. I guess it's a great hazing for what we're up against, right?" I grabbed my bag and decided that I'd keep my scrubs on for the time being. Getting out of there was more important than changing.

"That's what they say. I have no clue how these doctors do it, but I guess we're going to get a big-ass dose of the how along with the why." She smiled and moved back.

I pulled my bag from my locker and walked out into the hall as Parks turned the corner. He was the last person in the whole universe that I wanted to see.

"Princess Lizzy." He moved up beside me and pressed his shoulder against mine. "You don't look so hot."

I snorted. "So yesterday I was the girl of your dreams and today I'm chopped liver?"

"Oh no... You’re still her." He wrapped his arm over the top of my shoulders, and I started to pull back, but didn't want to overreact. He wasn't doing anything that I should find offensive. I was touchy because of Aiden. Nothing else.

"You're going to just keep dropping your heart on a cutting board and handing me a knife, aren't you?" I pulled from him as we reached the door, and turned to find Steph bouncing up with excitement on her pretty face.

"Parks! Come with us. We're going to grab something to eat." She hooked my arm with hers and glanced up at me. "Please. Please can he come?"

I rolled my eyes and looked back at him. He was intensely good looking, but no. Just no. "I almost feel like you're a needy little puppy that wants a place to sleep and someone to rub your belly."

He laughed, not taking my words offensively at all. Point for him. He pulled up his shirt to reveal a sexy six-pack and thick pectorals. He was flawless.

"Go ahead, princess. You can rub my belly any day." He turned at the sound of Aiden's voice, which stole my attention immediately.

"Parks. Get over here and stop harassing the residents. No one wants to pat any part of you. Behave." He smirked at Parks and gave me and Steph a warm smile.

My insides turned to mush as I tried to remember that I was in my late twenties and not fifteen again.

"Awww... come on. Can't someone be on my side?" Parks threw his hands in the air.

"I am." Steph poked at him, and he winked at her before pulling her into a side hug and turning his attention back to Aiden.

"We're going to grab a burger. You want to unscrew the ball and chain that has you stuck here 24/7 and come with us?" Parks nodded at Aiden. "Come on, buddy. Everyone has to eat."

"No, but thank you. Stop flashing people." Aiden turned his entrancing blue eyes on me. "Have fun, and don't let this guy bother you. Just keep pushing back and he might eventually get the hint."

"Never. She's going to be mine. I'm calling dibs." Parks chuckled and glanced down at Stephanie as she let out a grumpy sound. "You can be too. I’ll just start collecting women."

I grabbed Stephanie playfully and pulled her toward the door. "And on that note, we're going to dinner alone. You guys have fun."

"What? I got an invite!" Parks laughed loudly as we walked away.

"Elizabeth. You know I wanted him to come with us." Stephanie glanced up at me as we walked toward the parking lot. I'd taken the train into Manhattan, but I knew Steph well enough to know that she drove.

"I know that, but I need some time with you. Just me and you. That okay?" I released her and nodded toward her car. "Give me the keys, and I'll drive."

"Yeah, of course it's okay." She pulled her keys out and handed them to me. "I just keep thinking this guy is going to fucking notice me. It's so frustrating."

"He will. I'm not interested in him, Steph. You know that." I took a deep breath and got in the car, almost grateful for the silly drama that Parks kept causing between me and my best friend. It was easier than focusing on my recent transaction to play whore to my mentor.

What the hell was I thinking?

"Let's go to the sandwich shop a few blocks over. Dartin's Deli. They have a new roast beef on rye that everyone is talking about." She buckled up and glanced at the clock. "I have an hour before I have to be back."

"Aww... really? I was hoping you were off for the rest of the night." I pulled out of the parking lot and tried hard not to think about Aiden, but it was almost impossible.

"No. Dr. Mendom isn't going to let me go that easily." She leaned back and glanced out the window. "I know I'm being stupid over Parks, but he's so fucking hot. It's either him or your hottie. Which can I have? You take one, and I'll take the other."

I laughed. Steph hadn't changed since we were in junior high, calling dibs on various guys before the other. We'd always been attracted to the same type of guy, which proved to be a pain in the ass at first, but manageable later. Dibs was the peacekeeper, and I was good with it. Some part of me wondered why she never wanted to be with Jackson. The two of them would have been good together as well.

"I'm thinking you can have them both." I pulled into the sandwich shop and parked. "It's busy in there."

"It's all good. It moves fast. Plus, I see a group of residents from the hospital. We'll just crash their party." She got out of the car and moved toward the door before I could remind her of my need to spend some time together - alone.

I walked into the smell of fresh baked bread and the sound of laughter and conversations going on in every direction. "I'll get this."

She glanced back at me and lifted her eyebrow. "How? You get a sugar daddy?"

Her question hit a little too close to home, but I ignored it and pulled out my bank card. I needed to get Aiden my information and talk to him once more to see if he was really serious. There was still time for me to apologize, and even back out. The trouble was that no matter how disturbing the situation was, I didn't want to back out. I wanted to dive in deep. I just wished it were under different circumstances.

What did he think of me, offering myself up like a piece of meat for him to chew on any time that he wanted to? He couldn't respect that, and yet, he hadn't hesitated a bit to agree. His loneliness and need for a bedmate must have been much worse than I imagined.

How long had it been since he'd taken a woman to his bed? He mentioned taking strangers.

My phone buzzed and I looked down to see an unknown number. The text let me know quickly who I was talking to.

Bring your account information by my office tomorrow. This Wednesday I have an event. I want you there with me, as my resident. I appreciate your offer today. I think it's going to be fruitful for both of us. Just make sure you respect the severity of what it could do should the news of it get out.

I nodded, and texted him back that Wednesday would work. I could talk to him in the morning. I needed some time to really think through what I'd done, and if I could honestly go through with it. I was beyond attracted to him, but we'd moved from dancing along the line of inappropriate to diving head first into depravity.

The part of me that craved affection and carnality was thrilled. I'd have to rest heavily on that feeling alone if I wasn't going to chicken out.

"You alright? Who are you texting?" Steph glanced back at me as we moved up in the line.

"I'm good. No one. Wrong number." I dropped my phone into my purse and took a shaky breath. "Let's share. You know you can't eat a whole sandwich."

"Yeah, and you can eat two." She smirked and moved up to the counter, leaving me to wonder why in the world Aiden Crawford would be attracted to me. There were so many other woman in the hospital that would jump at the chance to share his bed. Why me?

Because you offered.