CHAPTER 55

JARED

"That's what I'm talking about!" I jumped in my spot, landing with both feet on the ground. My sneakers squeaked against the polished studio floor as I landed. We were finally back in the studio, and we sounded fucking great.

Everything was in place, and everyone was playing each song the way it was meant to be played. We were on fire, and if we kept this up, we would not only deliver the album in totality by our original release date, but we might even get it in under the wire.

This was how we’d always dreamed about things going. It just didn't happen all that often outside of dreamland.

"I knew there was a reason we had so many fans," Nick joked, dropping to his knees to play a random solo. When he was done, he lifted his grinning face and winked. "We're actually kind of good when we put our backs into it."

Dom chucked a drumstick at his head, but he couldn't quite keep from smiling. "You might be kind of good, but the rest of us are fucking brilliant."

"I concur." Matt laughed and gave Dom a high five. "Who knew a couple weeks of sleep, a bit of spit and polish, and the threat of losing everything we'd worked for would be all we needed to get our mojo back.”

“Mojo?” Caleb laughed so hard, he nearly sank to his knees. Gasping for air, he wiped tears from the corners of his eyes as he set his guitar down. “Are you in an Austin Powers movie or something?”

“Say what you will.” Matt winked and set his guitar down. “That dude had the right idea about a lot of things.”

“So did Jared, since we’re suddenly all back on our game,” Caleb pointed out, still chuckling. “Only he did it without round beds, shoulder pads, or any of that other crap.”

“Don’t mention a round bed around him, or next thing you know you he’ll order one,” Nick protested, groaning.

“Now that you’ve mentioned it,” I started, winking at Nick. “I feel like I should tell you I’ve already ordered one.”

“Bullshit.” Matt crumbled a receipt he pulled from his jeans and threw it at my head. “But that’s my cue to get out of here.”

“But it’s especially for you when you come over,” I called out after him as he turned his back on us and headed out the door. He laughed without turning around and held his middle finger up in the air.

“Still have our mojo back,” I heard him yell before the studio door slammed closed behind him.

Nick was still laughing when his eyes popped wide open. “Shit. He’s my ride. We’re heading out a party in Malibu some model’s throwing.”

He bolted out the door as if he didn’t have a whole stable of roadies who would drive him, actual drivers or the Uber app on his phone. Since he had all those things, only one explanation made sense. “He doesn’t know where it is, does he?”

Dom chuckled and rose from behind his kit. “Nope. Matt met the chick at a photo shoot while we were taking our … break, and she invited him.”

“Since when is Nick so hard up for models?” Caleb looked from me to Dom to the door, confusion marring his features.

Dom shrugged, walking to the door himself. “He’s not. Matt mentioned the girl knew that Irish actress he’s been hoping to sink his teeth into.”

“His teeth, huh?” I joked. “You off too?”

He cringed at my lame joke and nodded. “Yeah. You coming?”

“I’m gonna hang back a while. I got something I want to finish up here before I leave.” My eyes drifted to the grand piano sitting in the corner of the studio.

Dom didn’t question me and looked at Caleb. My brother shook his head, waving at Dom. “I need to talk to Jared for a minute. See you tomorrow.”

“See you,” Dom replied, pushing through the door.

Caleb waited until it shut again. “Today went well.”

“It did.” I walked over to the piano and sat down on the soft velvet bench, lifting the lid. “It’s good to be back.”

“Amen to that.” He shoved his hands in his pockets, his chest puffing as he took a deep breath.

“What’s going on with you?”

Releasing the breath, he gave his head a small shake. “I just can’t believe how close we came to losing all this. Guess we’ve got Alicia to thank for saving the day.”

We did. She was also the reason my fingers were itching to be on the piano keys. A melody had been taking shape in my head since I’d dropped her at her place after we went to see Gerry, along with some lyrics that were struggling to break free from the confines of my mind.

I was hoping the song would come together if I had some peace and quiet in the studio to just let it flow. “She sure is something, that girl.”

“I’m sorry about what I said in New York,” Caleb blurted, dragging a hand over the stubble on his jaw. “I was out of line.”

“You mean you’re sorry for telling me to stay away from her?” The memory of that conversation still stung.

Caleb hung his head, remorse in his eyes when they met mine. “Among other things. I shouldn’t have said all that. You were right. I don’t know what’s going on between the two of you, and I shouldn’t have made assumptions.”

I released a heavy sigh, letting one hand roam across the piano’s smooth keys. “You were also right about a lot of things that day. We do need her, for one.”

“Yeah, we do,” he agreed. “But I underestimated her by assuming she would walk out if you fucked up. After what she just stuck by us through, I feel like shit for thinking she was like all the others.”

“She’s different.” In so many more ways than I’d realized before. She was strong, resilient, and resourceful in her job and as a person, a woman, she was just incredible. Something was happening to me when it came to her. I didn’t want to put a name to it yet, but I was hoping this song that was begging me to get out would help bring things into focus for me.

“You really do care about her, don’t you?” Caleb asked, breaking into my thoughts and putting one possible name to what I was feeling.

I frowned. I hadn’t said anything about how I felt about Alicia to Caleb, but it looked like I wasn’t as good at hiding it as I thought. He ignored my expression, a thoughtful look in his eyes as he continued. “I can see that you do. You care about her in a way I haven’t ever seen you care about anyone.”

“I care about you. And the others,” I retorted. I wasn’t ready to have this conversation with him, or with anyone. Not until I could make sense of what was going on in my head.

“Not like that, you don’t,” Caleb scoffed. Either he didn’t realize I didn’t want to talk about it, or he just didn’t care. “You care about her in a very different way.”

My spine tensed, but then I realized it was just me and Caleb in the room, and he already knew at least some of the feelings I was wrestling with. “I care about her.”

His eyes widened in surprise at my admission, but he quickly schooled his features. “Like I said, different to what I’ve seen from you before. Anyway, I just wanted to apologize for warning you away from her.”

“I understand why you did it.” Which was why the memory of the conversation still stung. Caleb had been one hundred percent right that I was going to fuck things up, and I did.

If it hadn’t been for Alicia being who she was, she wouldn’t have given a shit about the band after I basically ghosted her after our night together. And if she hadn’t cared about us, I probably wouldn’t have been sitting in the studio right now.

In a nutshell, everything Caleb had feared from me had been for a damn good reason. The only reason his prediction of my relationship with her fucking up everything for the band hadn’t come true was her character. Not mine.

Caleb’s lips pulled up into an impish grin. “I know you understand, but I was still wrong to have done it. Consider my nose firmly in my own business from now on. Meddling in things I don’t know about has never been my style, and now I know why. You told me you two knew what you were doing, and I should’ve trusted that.”

He tapped his fist lightly on the piano, done saying his piece. “I’ll leave you to it.”

I nodded absently and allowed both hands to finally drift to the keys, pressing down on them softly as the melody in my head jumbled, refusing to come together. From the corner of my eyes, I saw Caleb turn when he reached the door. “I hope things work out for the two of you.”

“Me too,” I mumbled, but I wasn’t sure he heard me as the door swung shut behind him.

Finally alone, I closed my eyes and focused on the music. Memories flooded me as I worked. Alicia's eyes the first time I’d met her swam into my mind, the way she’d immediately seen through my act and the way she was always ready with a comeback and always pushed back.

The melody took shape around the memories and flowed through me, to the piano, creating a beautiful, melancholic piece I hadn’t intended to make, but I could definitely work with. I lost track of time, keeping at it until the notes became clearer, and the lyrics came tumbling out by themselves.

I was vaguely aware of the air changing, and then Alicia was standing on the other side of the piano. Her lips formed a soft smile as she watched me play. My fingers stilled over the keys, and a crease appeared between her manicured eyebrows when I stopped.

“I was enjoying listening to you,” she told me earnestly.

I patted the space beside me on the piano bench. “I want to play something for you if you’ve got a minute. Have a seat.”

“You know it’s just us left here, right? Everyone else has gone home, so I have a minute, but wouldn’t you rather leave?”

“After I play you this.”

She rounded the piano and sat on the very edge of the bench, her eyes continuously darting to the door. I placed my hands on her hips, scooted her closer to me, and then brought my hands up to massage her shoulders.

“Relax. You just told me everyone was gone for the day. Besides, no one comes in here but you and Gerry while we’re here.”

Turning her head to face me, she smiled and bumped my shoulder with hers. “You’re right. What’s this you’re working on you want me to listen to?”

“A new song,” I said cautiously, suddenly feeling nervous about the next part of what I had to tell her.

Toughen the fuck up, man. It’s just Alicia. Not like you’re baring your soul to thousands of people. Strangely, it kind of felt like it might have been easier to do it that way than as intimately as I was about to.

I cleared my throat, bringing my fingers back to the keys to start playing the intro to the song. “It’s a song I’m working on. It’s, uh, it’s about you.”

Before she could react, I launched into it, acutely aware of her sitting right next me listening to every note, every word. Her body was tense when she sat down and tenser when I’d moved her closer to me, but she relaxed as she listened, and by the time I was done, her head was resting on my shoulder.

I’d written hundreds of songs, but I’d never been as nervous to hear what anyone thought of one as I was to hear Alicia’s opinion about this one. I risked a peek at her to find her gazing up at me from where her head rested on my shoulder with a slightly dazed look in her eyes.

“That’s about me?”

I swallowed past the sudden dryness in my throat, nodding. Alicia lifted her head and put her palms on my cheeks, leaning forward to brush a kiss on my lips.