Chapter Twenty-Eight
Shawn
On my way home from school, I was fuming. I couldn’t believe that Dalilah would sink so low.
“What a bitch,” I muttered as I thought about what I could do. I didn’t know what was going on, exactly, but I knew that the more time I sat here and did nothing, the more she felt as though she was in control. I had to fix this.
However, after learning what happened and who it was that had told the school, I found that I wasn’t angry for myself. I didn’t care one way or the other what people said about me. Hell, my friends were proud of me.
Therefore, I certainly wasn’t going to lose much from this. If I had to deal with a few whispers for a little while until the next big social tragedy rocked the halls of the school then so be it.
However, the person I was concerned about was Valerie.
I felt awful for what I had done to her. I didn’t particularly care that I had spilled the secret to my father and his wife. I also couldn’t care less whether either one of them ever wanted to see me again; but Valerie, she didn’t deserve this.
With the whole situation mounting in my mind, I slammed the steering wheel and screamed, “I told her to leave Valerie alone!”
I grasped the wheel tightly, squeezing it. . I narrowed my eyes and glowered at the road ahead of me, increasing my speed and envisioning Dalilah in front of me.
At this time, in this state of mind, if she really was in front of me, it scared me slightly about how sure I was that I would have been able to hit her and actually feel relief.
I had never loved her. I lusted her for sure and I still found her extremely beautiful, but she was a lotus flower that poisoned everything in her path and I was no longer going to stand for her spell of seduction or her wrath. Somehow, I was going to fix this.
I had no idea what I was going to do, but I knew that I needed to figure something out, or I would go insane.
I sped around corners and blew through stop signs, but I had no idea where I was going. I was trying my best not to go to Dalilah’s house, because I was fairly certain, inside the only rational part of me that I deemed to be left, that if I showed up there, I would probably end up in jail within the hour.
She had already threatened to call the police and lie about me. I had no doubt that she was capable of it, but if I gave her a reason to fear me, I would probably be incarcerated for murder before the day was done.
Therefore, I tried my best to resist the urge to go there. After all, she had already done her damage. There was nothing left that she could do to fix it. That was the funny thing about rumors. Once they were said and believed, even the person who started them could not take back what they did.
However, I had a feeling that the rumor was only the beginning for Dalilah and that scared me more than anything. Knowing her, this was her warning shot. I hated to see what her main event would end up being.
Still, I knew that I couldn’t go there and so, after driving around, erratically and aimlessly for a long while, I realized that I recognized the street that I was on.
After careful consideration though, I knew that I didn’t really want to be here either. I didn’t want to show up there at all, much less feeling as crazy as I did right now.
Even still, I kept driving and as I rounded the corner, I saw something strange in the driveway of the house where I grew up.
Curious and for the moment, forgetting my anger slightly, I leaned forward and squinted my eyes, but I couldn’t quite figure out what was going on.
I sped up and continued down the road until I could make out Valerie’s car filled with black bags. She was just sitting in the driveway though, with the motor running, as though she was about to leave.
Is she moving out? I thought as I parked the car in front of the house and suddenly, I was overcome with fear. If she moved, I might not know where she went. I could lose her forever!
With that, I jumped out of the car and ran up to her.
I put my hands on the side of the car, sure that she would not move it away like she did before without running over my feet. That probably wasn’t the best plan, because like Dalilah was for me, I was pretty certain that if Valerie was going to run over anyone today, I would be her first choice.
“What is going on?” I asked her.
When she stared at me, she had tears streaming down her face. “Go away!” she screamed. “This is your fault!”
I narrowed my eyes with concern as I stuck my head into her car. “What is my fault? What happened?”
“Go away!” She glowered at me with hateful eyes.
“No!” I exclaimed, slamming my hand down on her door. “Tell me what happened. I need to know! I need to fix this!”
“What does it look like, genius?” Mom kicked me out!”
“What?” I felt my heart sink deep and defeated in my chest. I never thought, even for a second that I would have to worry about what my father and my step-mom would do to Valerie. I knew that they might be mad at her, but I never expected that they would do something so cold; especially considering that they didn’t even kick me out when I was having my plethora of problems with them.
I left on my own.
“Are you serious?” I asked, trying to find some way that I could make everything disappear for her. I wanted her to have a good life and she was right, this was all my fault. She might have wanted it, just as much as I did, but she was the one who was suffering the most, while I was had caused the problem by telling literally the worst people on the planet for me to have told. I felt awful.
As an answer, she shoved a letter at me and my eyes skimmed over it, but I didn’t need to read it. The important attributes that I found was that while it mentioned my father, it was from Valerie’s mother, just like she had said. “This doesn’t make any sense,” I breathed impatiently.
“Like I said, this is all your fault. But I have to be out of here by the time they get home, so I have to go…” With that she snatched the letter back from me and made a motion like she was going to drive away, no matter what.
I panicked and grasped her car harder. “Wait! Please! I don’t know what to do, but please…I want to fix this.”
“You can’t fix this…” she spat harshly.
“Well, then at least let me try to make it better. Meet me at our spot…now.” When it looked like fuck you was going to be the next thing that came tumbling out of her mouth, I allowed myself to show the anguish and the desperation I was feeling as I added, “Please…I want to help you.”
“I think you’ve done enough,” she answered and moved as though she was going to leave again.
“Please!” I yelled, feeling myself grow emotional. I didn’t want to be showing this unstable, crazy side to her, but right now, I couldn’t help it. Learning what happened to her made me feel an intense sense of pain. I wondered, probably selfishly, if my father and stepmother had done this specifically to hurt me, since they knew they couldn’t do anything else that would have near as much of an effect.
When she stared at me, almost as though she was angered by my outburst, I swallowed hard. “Please…I can’t…I can’t let you go without having a plan. I owe you that, at least.”
She thought about this for a moment and stared deeply into my eyes before finally she shook her head. “Fine. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
I nodded, trying to find some assurance of sincerity in her voice. Normally, she was a very honest person, but considering what I had put her through, I wouldn’t blame her in the least if she had decided to lie to me, just so she wouldn’t have to look at me any longer. I wouldn’t blame her, but I couldn’t bear the thought of losing her, especially since she had nowhere to go and it was all my fault.
Still, when she turned now, I had a sneaking suspicion that she was going to leave this time without worrying if I was in the way or not. I backed up quickly. “Thank you,” I said as I gave her space, hoping that the genuineness that I felt would come across to her.
“Whatever.” She rolled her eyes as she pulled out of the driveway.
As she pulled away, I wondered exactly what the chances were of her actually coming to meet me at the park. I figured, as I made it back to my car that they were probably slim to none, but that didn’t matter.
I had to try my best to be there for her. I had to try.
After all, with the way things seemed to be going, she and I were really the only people on the planet that the two of us had left and in my mind, we had to make the best of it.