Chapter 11

 

I twirl the lighter between my fingers. Running my thumb over the words that she had carved into it.  I hate life. I hate the world. Mostly, I hate myself. I let things happen that I should have been more aware of. If someone was after me, I should have known about it. Instead, they took the one thing that mattered to me. How they knew about her is beyond me. I’ve researched the shit out of every single thing I could find. Throwers are nowhere to be seen.

“Saints said they heard somethin’ about the attack,”  Roc says, and my gaze snaps to his.

“What did they hear?” I ask as he sits in the chair across from me.

“Picked Angel up when she left here that day. They saw her leave. Assumed she was someone’s lady,” He says shaking his head. That can’t be right.

“Angel said they were after me. Not the club,” I tell Roc, he nods his head as though he already knows this.

“Heard that, too. She was, uh… She was givin’ them a good fight from what I was told,”  He tells me unsure of how I’ll react. I don’t want to hear this shit. I start to shove off the couch, but Roc stops me.

“Look, the only thing we can come up with right now is, that guy you shot a while back. He was the kid of one of the Thrower’s. He wasn’t affiliated with the club, though.”  He tells me. My mind wanders back to how many guys I’ve actually killed. If he wants to go that route, he needs to be more specific.

“I don’t know what guy you’re talkin’ about here, Roc. There’s been a few, brother.” His eyes close for a second before coming back to me.

“Outside of town. The deal that went bad about seven months back.” Shit, now I remember.

“Fuck me. I didn’t know shit about that guy.” Scrubbing my hand over my face, I grab my beer. Taking a long pull, I let that sink in.

“Turns out, no one really knew shit about the kid. He was fuckin’ the wrong people on the wrong day. Not the first time he did it.” I chuckle a little when I look back over at him.

“Sure, as fuck was the last time, though.” He laughs along with me. How could he not? I did what I did for this club. Much like a lot of things I do.

“So, now I need to find daddy, and send him on his way to meet up with his son in hell. Sounds easy, right?”  

***

 

“You look like shit.” Ghost slaps his hand on my shoulder. I know what I look like. Hell, that’s exactly how I feel.

“I know, man.” I bring the cigarette to my lips, inhaling the smoke.

“Why don’t you go see her?”  He asks, seemingly concerned. I shake my head, though. I don’t think that’s a good idea.

“She didn’t want to be near me,” I tell him in sureness. Ghost shakes his head before looking back at me.

“You don’t believe that shit–do you?” Honestly, I saw the way she looked at me when I left. She was torn.

“I promised her I wouldn’t bother her. I promised her I would kill those motherfuckers.” He knows what I mean.

“We will. It’s not like we haven’t been lookin’, Devil. We’ll find them.” His words piss me off a little more.

“It’s been a month! A fuckin’ month, and my worthless no good ass hasn’t found them yet! What the fuck kind of man does that make me?” Before he can respond, he grins over my shoulder. I don’t know what kind of sick shit he’s doing now, but I want no part of it.

“Fuckin’ prick.” Ghost slams his shoulder into mine when he walks past me.

“I haven’t given up on you yet.” My head drops forward. What’s she doing here? I turn slowly, looking at the only thing that has ever made sense to me. Angel. Her smile is bright. She looks me in the eye before Ghost steps in front of her.

“Good to see you in one piece,”  Ghost tells her, pulling her into a hug. Something tugs at my stomach. My chest feels tight, like I can’t breathe.

“It feels good to be whole.” She pulls away from him, and he walks off with a grin. I stand there, taking her in. She looks different. She looks happy, in a way. She’s dressed completely different than she used to. She’s wearing a long flowing dress that shows off just her shoulders. Sparkly sandals on her feet show off her painted toenails. She isn’t the girl that left here, that much I can see.

“You don’t like the new clothes?”  She asks as she pulls my attention back to her eyes.

“You look amazin’, sweetheart. I just didn’t expect to see you here.”  I’m telling the truth. She steps toward me, her hair blowing in the wind. My heart slams double time in my chest.

“I missed you. I wanted to see you.” Her eyes flicker with a fire that I’ve never seen before.

“I missed you, too.” A tear slides down her cheek. I reach up, gripping her face in my hands. My thumb runs over her cheek, wiping the tear away. I let my thumbs roam her cheeks as she watches me intently. The silence should be scary, yet, I find peace in it. I trail my thumb over her bottom lip, loving how her mouth parts. Her eyes flutter closed.

“I haven’t given up on you yet.” 

We stand there like this for a long time. In fact, I lose all sense of time. Feeling her skin against mine, I can’t make my mind work at all. Angel’s the one that finally talks.

“You look so lost.” She’s being sincere.

“I feel like I am,” I tell her truthfully. Her smile fades away within seconds.

“I can’t stay, Devil. I’m trying to find my way again.” I think something deep down inside of me wanted to believe that. I knew she couldn’t stay.

“Then what are you doin’ here?” Her hands come to rest on my arms, griping my wrists.

“I don’t know, Devil. I don’t know how to be me anymore.” Tears fall down her cheeks. My breath catches in my throat.

“You know who you are, Angel. You’re where you were meant to be.” Dropping my hands from her face, I take a step back.

Angel watches me until we both almost break. My mind whirls around the idea of never seeing her again. She isn’t Angel, the girl that walked away from here. She’s ruined and broken. She’s lost.

“Don’t walk away from me, Devil,” She yells. I shake my head but I don’t know how to keep her anymore. I walk past her but when her hands land on my waist, I’m lost in her touch. My feet refuse to move. I’m stuck in place.

“Can I ask you something?”  She asks me sincerely. Looking down into her eyes, how could I say no.

“Ask me anything, darlin’.” Her eyes beam up at me. Softness reflects in them.

“Will you not give up on me just yet, either?” It’s like a slap to the face. It’s as though a hand has wrapped itself around my heart.

“I’ve never given up on you.” I tell her. Angel slams her lips against mine. The taste of her filters its way through me. My dick hardens instantly and my heart hammers in my chest.

“Take me to your room, Devil.” The tears fall down her cheeks but I lift her in my arms. I walk us inside, past everyone, and straight down the hallway. As soon as I get her inside my room, I kick the door closed behind us. I take long strides, making it to the bed in no time. Laying her down, she looks like her name.

An Angel.