Ten
I may have been relaxed the night before because it was impossible not to be. Not with the way Adam had made me feel. The way we’d hidden ourselves away in our little world for that time, not letting anything in besides each other. But now, I was nervous as hell as I made my way downstairs.
I wasn’t sure what I should wear. When I’d gone for my interview, I hadn’t paid much attention to what people we were wearing. Ron had been in a suit, but he was a supervisor and maybe his dress code was different than the others. There hadn’t been many women in the office either, which didn’t surprise me. I’d chosen to go into a field dominated by men, after all. I wasn’t sure if I should wear a skirt or slacks. I didn’t want to be too dressed up if that wasn’t the usual attire at Logics. I also didn’t want to appear too casual either. I’d finally decided on a pair of black dress slacks and a pretty blouse with black and white polka dots. I thought the chunky black heels I’d chosen added a touch of femininity to the outfit and I’d pulled my blonde hair back into a sleek ponytail. I knew it was going to be hard being taken seriously as a woman at the office and I didn’t want that fact to be a distraction, so I thought the outfit was perfect for my first day.
My nerves were kicking into high gear as I made my way down the last few steps and into the kitchen where Adam waited for me. He’d showered already and now stood by the stove frying up some eggs and bacon in a pair of long red gym shorts and a white t-shirt, his dark hair still damp from the shower.
He let out a low whistle when he saw me and I felt my cheeks blush. I walked over and swatted him on the arm.
“Stop being dumb,” I told him, but he just grinned at me.
“I won’t stop whistling at my smokin’ hot girl,” he said, reaching over and slapping me playfully on the butt.
“Do you ever think of anything other than sex?” I sighed.
“Yes, but not when you’re around,” he said and I couldn’t help the quiet laugh that escaped my throat.
“Breakfast is ready,” he said, scraping the eggs onto a plate along with the bacon and setting it down on the counter before me. I stared down at it and knew I didn’t have an appetite. The nerves were preventing that.
“This was so sweet of you, Adam,” I said with a slight grimace, “but I can’t eat.”
“You have to eat,” he insisted.
“I can’t eat,” I said and a grin spread on my face, “unless you want me to vomit all over my new co-workers.”
“You’re disgusting, Caroline,” he said with a laugh, but pushed the plate closer to me, his face turning serious. “You have to eat though. Even if you’re nervous. You want to do your best today, don’t you?”
“You sound just like my mother, you know that?” I asked.
“I don’t give a damn who I sound like. Eat.” He pushed the plate at me again and I rolled my eyes, grabbing a piece of bacon and taking a bite.
“You’ll thank me later,” he said as he got himself a plate and sat down beside me at the counter. As I took a few more bites, I knew he was probably right.
“You’re too good to me, Adam DeLain.”
“Yeah, I know,” he said smugly. “Don’t forget it either.”
“Never,” I said, looking over to him.
He reached over and placed his hand gently over mine as we continued to eat. No words were needed. I knew what he was doing. He simply wanted me to know he was there. I didn’t say anything back either, but I scooted my chair closer to his and with him beside me, I felt the nerves finally start to settle.
~~~
I tried to remain confident as Ron led me to my desk. I’d walked in with the confidence Adam had helped me find at breakfast, but I could feel it wavering as we got deeper into the office. Everyone looked so serious, so busy, as if they’d been here forever. I felt like a fish out of water, like an imposter almost, but then I forced myself to forget that and to remember that I’d worked hard to be here. I’d spent the last four years of my life studying and working hard to be here. I may not have the experience of my new co-workers, but I deserved to be here.
I kept repeating that in my head, but my silent mantra was cut off when Ron came to a stop at a cluster of cubicles. There were three men all typing away on their computers. The one with white hair and beard must’ve seen us walk up because he turned his head away from his monitor and looked at us, staring at me through his wire rimmed glasses. The other men turned around then too.
“This will be your desk over here,” Ron said to me, leading me to the fourth desk in the pod. The men all watched me as I went to the desk. I could see the skepticism on their faces, but I smiled at them as I made my way over.
“This is Caroline Hale,” Ron said to them. “The new member of the team. Caroline, this is Frank Baxter,” he said gesturing toward the one with white hair and glasses. “And this is Brett Foster.” He was definitely younger than Frank, maybe in his mid-thirties. “And this is Sean Ericson.” The last member of the team didn’t look much older than myself. He was cute in a geeky sort of way. He had curly brown hair that any woman would’ve killed for. It was shaggy on top and short on the sides and his cheeks were covered in scruff, as if he hadn’t shaved in a couple of days. He smiled at me and I was grateful he hadn’t looked at me like a specimen in a microscope the way the other two had.
“Hi,” I said to them as I set my purse on my new desk, thinking to myself how bare it looked.
“There will be a meeting in the conference room at ten o’clock, Caroline. We’ll get everyone up to speed on the current project we’re working on. Until then, the team can get you caught up on procedures and protocols. I’ll be in my office,” he said, pointing to a door not that far from the group of cubicles. “Let me know if you need anything.”
“I will. Thank you, Ron.” He nodded and smiled under his mustache before turning and disappearing into his office.
The quiet was awkward when he left and I waited for one of them to say something, but it was silent. I wondered if I should say something, but then I heard the squeak of a chair and I turned to see Sean walking towards me, closing the few feet between us and holding out his hand to me.
“Welcome to Logics,” he said and I shook his hand, smiling at him, grateful for his warmth.
“Thank you,” I told him. “How long have you worked here?”
“Going on three years. They hired me right out of college,” he said and I was instantly intrigued.
“Where did you go?” I asked him.
“Amherst,” he answered. “You?”
“I just graduated last week from the University of Vermont.”
“Is that where you’re from?”
“Yes. A small town called Silver Falls. It’s about a half an hour away from Burlington,” I told him and he laughed softly.
“Wherever the hell that is,” he said. “Geography was never my thing. Put me in front of a computer though and I can solve anything.” He grinned a proud grin and I didn’t doubt what he said.
“I couldn’t help but notice,” I began, my eyes traveling over the office, “that there aren’t many women around here.”
“That’s because there aren’t,” he smirked and I felt a frown trying to form on my lips. “You seem surprised. You do work in IT, after all.”
“No, I’m not surprised. I guess I was hopeful is all,” I said with a smile. I didn’t want to give my new co-workers the wrong impression. I already felt as if Frank didn’t like me even though he hadn’t said a single word to me. He was looking at me out of the corner of his eye, but he’d yet to personally greet me. Brett got up then and walked over to us, extending his hand.
“Good to meet you, Caroline,” he said and then finally Frank got up and came over.
“Hey there,” he said in a deep, gravelly voice that sounded as if he’d smoked heavily in his life.
“It’s really good to meet you all. I hope I can be of some help on the project,” I said with a smile.
“Yeah. Me too,” Frank mumbled and then walked away from our desks and down a hall, presumably to the bathroom.
“Pay no attention to Father Time,” Sean said quietly.
“Father Time?” I asked curiously.
“The white hair? The beard? The guy’s the spitting image of Father Time.”
“Did you come up with that name?’
“No. That would be Brett.” I looked over to Brett who had a slight grin on his face and he shrugged his shoulders.
“C’mon. It’s a harmless nickname,” he said and I laughed quietly.
“And don’t take Frank’s attitude personally. He doesn’t like anyone,” Sean said.
“I’ll try and remember that,” I said.
“If you want to get settled we can catch you up on what we’re working on. You can get your feet wet and we can really see if you know what you’re doing.” Brett smirked at me, but I knew he was just being playful.
“I assure you I know what I’m doing. I may not look the part, but you won’t regret having me on your team, I can promise you that.” I added a seriousness to my voice because although we were being lighthearted, I knew I had to prove myself and that’s what I intended to do.
“Then we’ll all get along just fine,” Brett said, turning back to his desk. Sean did the same as I sat down at my desk.
I just sat there for a moment, looking around my little space. I couldn’t believe I was here. I’d done it and I wasn’t ashamed to say I was proud of myself.
~~~
The meeting had gone well. Brett and Sean had given me the run-down of how things worked in the office so when Ron went over the goals and expectations of the current project, I felt prepared and even offered a few ideas. I may have been presumptuous, but Ron didn’t seem put off by it. I wanted to contribute without seeming like a know-it-all, especially since I knew I still had so much to learn.
I’d grabbed a sandwich at a café after the meeting, bringing it back to my desk so I could work on some things while I ate. While I had a long way to go with decorating my cubicle, I had brought two things: a small framed picture of my family and then one of Adam and me, which I set up on my desk. It brought me a little bit of familiarity in this very unfamiliar place.
I was setting up my computer and taking the last few bites when Sean and Brett came in from their lunch.
“How’s it going?” Sean asked, both of them stopping behind me from where I sat in my chair.
“Fine. Just eating and getting things set up,” I said, turning around. I noticed Sean was looking over my shoulder, a quizzical expression on his face and he was quiet for a few seconds.
“That picture,” he began, the confusion obvious in his voice, but then it trailed off.
“What about it?” I asked, even though I had a feeling what was coming and part of me regretted putting the picture out.
“Who is that?” he asked bluntly.
“That’s my boyfriend,” I answered and he looked even more puzzled.
“He looks exactly like Adam DeLain, the Red Sox pitcher,” he said, his eyes leaving the picture and looking back at mine.
“Um,” I began, wondering how I was going to explain this. “Yeah…that’s him.” My voice got quieter and I saw how perplexed Sean and Brett both looked.
“That’s him?” Brett asked. “That’s Adam DeLain?”
“Yes,” I answered, matter-of-factly.
“Are you serious?” Brett said, his voice raising a little higher.
“Yes, I’m serious.”
“You’re Adam DeLain’s girlfriend?” Sean asked this time.
“Yes, I am.”
“And this isn’t a joke?”
“Why would I joke about something like that, Sean?” I asked, finding the whole conversation quite amusing actually.
“I don’t know. It’s…I…I guess I just didn’t expect it.”
“Well, it’s true,” I said and then grinned at both of them, hoping to make it less weird. “If you ever need Sox tickets, just let me know.”
Both Sean and Brett stood there. I was certain neither of them quite knew what to say.
“You’re pretty serious then?” Brett asked and I nodded.
“I’ve known Adam practically my whole life.”
“That answers your question then,” Brett said, turning to Sean.
“What question?” I asked.
“Sean here was going to ask you out.” Brett was grinning widely and Sean looked mortified. His cheeks even turned red, but so did mine.
“No…I…I was just going…” Sean stuttered, but I looked at him and smiled sympathetically at him.
“Could one of you show me the prototype Ron mentioned during the meeting?” I asked, changing the subject, which Sean seemed grateful for.
“Yeah, sure. Follow me,” Sean said and I had to smile to myself when I heard Brett laughing quietly as we walked away. These guys seemed cool, despite Father Time. As I followed Sean into the lab, I thought I might like it here.