CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Ellie
I was almost asleep when I felt Diesel stir behind me. I stayed still, waiting to see what was going to happen. He scooted closer to me. His warmth invaded me and I fought the smile tugging at my lips. His face snuggled into the crook of my neck. It felt so good.
I had wanted this for so long. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that the timing was all wrong. There was a pit in my belly that kept me from letting myself go and enjoying it. My mind raced with images of everything I had seen earlier that night.
His breath was hot and heavy on my neck, sending a shiver through me. His scruff was rough against my skin and made my flesh prickle everywhere. I could feel his length hardening against my butt as he pushed closer to me. My lips parted and a breath I didn’t even know I had been holding, rushed out, desperate to escape. I felt the fire inside of me, spilling out from my core. His hand traveled the length of my side, his fingers lightly dancing over my skin. An electric shock followed all the way down, before he settled on my hip, gripping it firmly.
I was wet. I was needy. And I wanted more than anything for him to slip inside of me until I saw stars. As if he could read my thoughts, he pulled my leg back to drape over his and I let him with no resistance. No hesitation. Because I wanted this. I wanted him. His hardness slipped between my thighs. His hips rocked back and forth to a long-winded melody, rubbing his length against me. I swallowed hard and bit my lip. My body moved on its own, my back arching, my butt pushing further into him.
I was all too aware of the cool air surrounding us and how my body was hot all over, a heat that came from the inside. He palmed my breast and a loud, desperate moan escaped me. Then he was moving, sliding into me ever so slowly, as he kissed my shoulder. I felt every inch of him push forward effortlessly until he was fully seated inside me.
“Are you with me?” I asked, needing to know that he was aware. I needed to know that he knew it was me he was with. I needed to know that it was me he wanted.
“I’m with you, pixie,” he said, his voice low and raw in my ear, sending a hard shiver through me. He clutched the hem of my shirt, and I helped to pull it off before tossing it to the floor.
We moved together almost painfully slow. This wasn’t like what we had done in the motel room. This wasn’t like what I heard and imagined he did with Tammy and the fiery redhead. No, this was something new. Something more. He was here with me, showing me everything he couldn’t tell me. I felt his pain. I felt his uncertainty. I felt his affection. And in return, I gave him my reassurance and love. I gave him my heart. With every breath and every moan, I let him know how much I wanted him. All of him.
“Diesel,” I moaned, clenching the sheets with one hand his hair with the other.
“Caleb,” he said, confusing me for a second. “When we’re alone, you can call me Caleb.”
I smiled. I was finally breaking down his walls and he was letting me in.
I felt the buildup, my core clenching around him. He thrust deeper and faster. His breaths came out more rugged and heavy.
“Caleb, please, don’t stop,” I panted.
“Fuck, Ellie, you feel so good. I want to feel you come with me deep inside of you. It’s all I can think of since I met you. Since I rode away from you.”
His words hit something deep inside of me, sending me over the edge and calling his name out loudly. He pushed into me two more times before he swelled and stilled, his release spilling deep inside me. I felt it, every twitch, every spurt. I realized then that he wasn’t wearing a condom. And for some reason, I loved the idea of being filled with him.
We didn’t move. We didn’t separate. He held me close as our breaths returned to normal. The air was thick and heavy around us. Something had changed and I wondered how long it would stay that way. I wondered how long until his walls came back up and I was alone again. He pulled me tighter into him and I kept my eyes forward. I wasn’t ready to look at him and break this spell.
“Ellie,” he said after a long while, his thumb rubbing back and forth on the side of my bump. He cleared his throat and continued. “I know you have a lot of questions about what you saw tonight. And there are a lot of things that I can’t tell you, but I will answer what I can. I want to be as honest as I can with you.” I nodded, tears suddenly running down my face.
But there was only one thing running through my mind at that moment. I turned in his arms. The loss of him as he slid out of me almost left me breathless. I faced him, his eyes looking into mine.
“Just one,” I said trying to keep my voice from cracking.
His brows pinched together in confusion and I brought my hand up to smooth the deep line that set between them. Then I lightly ran my fingers along his jaw, loving the way his scruff felt against my soft pads.
“I have just one question.” His eyes were now that beautiful ice blue, shining with curiosity. “Are you okay?” It was the only thing that mattered. I saw a glimpse of what he did. Of what he felt he had to do. And I needed to know that he saw some sort of light at the end of the tunnel.
He blew out a heavy breath as his head crashed into my naked chest. I wrapped my arms around him, cradling his head with one hand and lightly rubbing his back with the other. He held me tight for a long while. No more words were spoken. I felt him breaking down and putting himself back together, and I held him through it all. His face came up and he pulled me in for a slow, deep kiss. He was telling me everything as his soft lips bounced off of mine. Even if I couldn’t understand everything he wanted me to know, I took it all. Maybe at that second, he wasn’t completely whole, but he would be.
I felt that he needed more. And in truth, I needed more too. I rolled him onto his back as I climbed on top of him, our lips never once pulling apart. I reached between our bodies and wrapped my hand around him, finding him still half-hard.
Without thinking or over analyzing that I had no idea what I was doing, I stroked him. He moaned into my mouth as his fingers tangled in my hair. He thickened and grew in my hand, and I loved that I could do that to him.
I broke apart from him and looked down into his heavy-lidded eyes. I rose up and sank down on him in one swift motion. The hard lines of his stomach muscles tightened and his head fell back. A moan spilled from me as my body mimicked his. Sitting up all the way I began to move and grind against him. He was deeper than he had been before. I wasn’t slow. I wasn’t soft. I wasn’t scared to give and take everything. I bounced with a steady, frantic need. His fingers dug into my hips as he met me thrust for thrust.
“Caleb, that feels so good,” I called out. “Oh! Yes!”
He pulled me down, pinning me to his chest as he took over, thrusting up into me with a vengeance.
“This what you want, pixie?” he grunted into my ear. I could feel myself gushing between my legs. “You want me to fuck you? You want to feel every inch of my cock inside you, filling you?” His words only turned me on more.
Breathless, I nodded. I bit my lip and clawed at anything within reach. It felt so good. Like nothing I had felt before. Like everything I could have only ever imagined.
“Yes,” I moaned.
“Say it, baby. I want to hear you say it.” His breath was hot against my shoulder as he spoke.
But I couldn’t say it. I had never done or said anything like that before. He pulled my head back so he could look at me, his hands holding firmly onto each side of my face. My eyes widened and I felt the blush creeping up from my chest.
“P-please.” I couldn’t form words, let alone the ones he wanted me to say. He slowed his movements and the buildup I felt coming halted. I cried out on the inside. I was so close and I wanted it so bad.
“Say it. Tell me what you want.” He thrust into me quickly, the sound of our skin slapping together echoed through the room. Then he pulled back slowly. I could feel every bump and vein and ridge of him. I could feel his piercing sliding against me as my walls quaked and tightened, trying to pull him back inside of me. I squirmed and writhed urgently against him, trying to get some sort of friction. Desperate for more, everything inside of me broke.
“Fill me up please, Caleb!” I screamed. “I want to feel you deep inside of me.”
I didn’t even have a second to freak out about what I had just said. Sure, It wasn’t anywhere near the level of hot and filthy words he had just sad to me. But it was more than I could have ever imagined myself saying. It seemed to satisfy him, though. He gripped me again, a smirk on his face, and pounded into me relentlessly.
“That’s it, Ellie, come for me,” he demanded and I did. I came so hard, calling out his name over and over again, only seconds before he pulled me down and I felt his release fill me up again. “Fuck!” he growled out.
Spent, I collapsed onto him, both of us slick with sweat and panting. I was barely aware of him shifting, sliding me off of him and tucking me into his side before I drifted off.