MID MARCH

 

We’re at the airport, and while Danger is busy chatting with Luke, I’m sitting here playing with my phone when a message comes through from someone I’ve not heard from in a long time. My lips turn up in the brightest of smiles, and I swipe the screen to read the message.

 

SlutsvilleSkye: Hey girl, how’s things? I miss the fuck out of you…

 

My eyes flood with unshed tears at the thought of my best friend. I’ve missed her, and I wonder how she’s going back at the club. I know things with her and FIM have been going well, although he’s now got his road name and they now call him Stealth. Which is quite fitting seeing as how he would always sneak up on people. I type back an honest reply.

 

Me: HEY!!! OMG, I miss you like a fucking recovering nympho misses the cock! Things are… GREAT. They can be a little testing at times, but Danger is amazing and very… attentive. ;) But in all honesty, I really like him, like REALLY like him. I’m glad I left with him. At first, it was to get away from the club and reminders of Steel, but the more time I spend with Danger, the more I realize that me and Steel are friends and that’s all we ever were. The feelings I had for him were friendship and lust. It’s nothing compared to how I feel for Danger, I don’t even know what this feeling is Skyzer, it’s… breathtaking!

 

It suddenly hits me why I was so torn up about Danger being with Effa. About why this feeling is so breathtaking, and why I feel so undeniably high when I’m around Danger.

I’m in love with him.

 

SlutsvilleSkye: I’m so freaking happy for you whorebag. It’s nice to see you with someone who appreciates you for you and not just ‘cause you’re a convenience, you know what I mean? Not that Steel ever treated you like that, but I’m just saying you and Steel would never have worked out, but I’m glad you’re happy and you’ve found someone who makes your pussy tingle.

 

I smile at her response and it’s completely true, not only does Danger make my pussy tingle but he makes my heart flutter. I want to tell Skye that I love him, but I think I should tell Danger first. I just have to find the right time.

 

Me: I am happy and I love being a rocker’s girlfriend. I kind of wonder what I ever saw in Steel in the first place. lol Danger has the same broody confidence and dominance, but he’s a softy at heart. He’s broken, but I’m trying to fix him, slowly and carefully.

 

It’s true. I know Danger still has hang ups regarding Ella, but I’m willing to work on it with him. I need us to work, because in my heart he’s the one for me. I just know it.

 

SlutsvilleSkye: I’m so excited for you. You have to come and visit soon when Danger has a break in his schedule. But for now, I have to get ready to go on stage. I love your face whorebag, and I’ll talk to you soon.

 

Frowning, I sigh and don’t reply. I know going on stage means she’s at Strapless and is about to go and perform a strip tease for perverted old men just like I used to do. But if Danger hadn’t come into my life I would probably be there now working right next to her. I feel bad for her, there’s a whole other life out here that she doesn’t even understand, but she’s stuck at that club and it’s doing my head in. I just have to remember I’m out now, and I have my chance to shine with my prince charming, and fuck me if I’m not going to make this fairy tale my bitch.

 

DANGER

 

My voice is breathy as I sing to the packed out Tokyo Dome in the heart of Japan. We’ve been on tour for a while now, and I’ve noticed over the last week my voice is becoming breathier, but I’ve put it down to wear and tear. However, tonight as I belt out the final lyrics to Hold Your Breath, my throat is hurting. I’m glad this concert is coming to an end, because I’m not sure how much longer I can keep singing for—which is concerning me, as I belt out the final chorus and my throat tickles. I want to cough, but I hold it back and take a breath between words to gain my focus. I don’t know what the fuck’s going on, but I need to figure it out. I sing out the final line of the song and the beat drops as the crowd erupts into applause, I obviously haven’t disappointed them. Even though I could tell my voice was off slightly, I don’t think they could.

I lean down grabbing my water bottle, undoing the lid and guzzling half the contents in one go before returning to the mic.

“Thank you Tokyo, we’re Recoil and you’ve been fucking amazing. Goodnight!” I call out noticing the dry huskiness to my voice. I grit my teeth as I rush off the stage.

Ryan and Matt continue to wave frantically to the crowd lapping up the attention. I need to get my throat feeling better, because we’re not even halfway through this tour and if my voice gives out now, we’re screwed. Jogging down the stairs, my feet are heavy as they stamp on the black metal and I guzzle the water down furiously trying to dull the aching itch.

Lunar is quickly by my side and she brings her hand up to my arm in a comforting gesture looking at me through a worried glare. “Are you okay?”

She’s always so attuned, my girl.

“Why? Did I sound like shit?”

She winces and shakes her head. “No, you sound amazing as always, but you don’t look yourself. Something’s up.”

“I’m fine,” I say and shrug out of her grip to walk away from her. I don’t want to tell her I’m freaking out. I don’t want to freak her out, and I certainly don’t want to show any signs of weakness. My feet take me down to the green room as the tepid liquid from the water bottle does nothing to soothe my scratchy throat. Making my way to the dresser with the mirror in front of it, I lean down and open my mouth trying to look down my throat to see if I can see anything. The effort is futile. One—the room is dimly lit and I can’t see shit. And two—I’m not a doctor, so I don’t even know what I’m looking for.

A presence to my side alerts me that someone’s watching me, and I turn with my tongue still half way out of my mouth to see Ryan smirking. I stop, stand up straight, and take another gulp of my water like I wasn’t just being a tiny bit weird in front of a mirror in a room by myself as he continues to smirk while tilting his head.

“You ogling yourself in the mirror again?” he teases walking into the room further.

I roll my eyes and throw my now empty water bottle at him. It smacks his shoulder and then tumbles to the ground.

“No, to be honest, I think I’m getting sick.”

Ryan takes a step back from me putting his fingers up in an ‘X’ sign. “Then stay the fuck away from me. And rest! That voice… we need it.”

“I know we’re finally making it. Our shows are huge, the fans are great, and now I go and get the flu… what a joke!”

Ryan winces and shakes his head. “Tell Luke. He’ll get someone in with a heap of remedies to fix you right up, I’m sure.”

Nodding, I take in a deep breath. “Yeah, you’re right. I’ll go find him.” I head out the door in search of our agent come manager. I need to sort this out and nip it in the bud. It doesn’t take me long to find him talking to the roadies who are packing up after the show. I move over to him and clear my throat trying to remove the niggle. Luke hears me and turns.

“Danger, my main man, you killed it tonight. But I can tell you’re getting tired, so I need you to rest a bit more. I know having Lunar around is… well fun, but you guys need to take it easy so you can be at your best.” He wraps his arm around my shoulders and we start to walk. “Now, I’m not saying you’re not at your best, but I noticed you straining a little right near the end. I don’t think anyone else noticed, no one has said anything, but I know you and I know when something’s up.”

I nod. “Yeah, that’s why I came to find you,” I say, my voice is hoarse and breathy.

Luke looks at me and raises his eyebrow. “I don’t like how your voice is sounding right now, Danger.”

“I know, that’s why I’m here. I think I’m getting something. My throat’s dry, scratchy and sore. Is there something we can do to get this shit taken care of?”

Luke sags his body and shakes his head. “Shit Danger! Now’s not the time to be getting sick. But yes, I’ll send someone to get some herbal shit for you. Rest that voice in the meantime, you have another show tomorrow and it’s sold out. You need to be on your game.”

Nodding, I break free from Luke’s grip and head back toward the green room pissed off that this is even happening. My head is hanging low as I thrust my hands into my jean’s pockets and glide through the green room door. Laughter echoes across the room as I look up to see Lunar and Ryan fighting over a bottle of something. He’s trying to grab it and is tickling her as she tries to keep the bottle away from him. It aggravates me for some reason, and I glare at the two of them having a wow of a time while I’m internally panicking.

“Is everything a fucking joke to you two?” I call out.

They stop and turn furrowing their brows as I turn around to storm out, too angry to stay in here.

“Danger!” Lunar’s voice calls out from inside the green room as I step out into the hall and start walking. Where I’m going I have no idea as she continues to call my name. Her light footsteps don’t go unnoticed as she catches up to me. Lunar reaches out grabbing my arm, pulling me to stop and turning me to face her. “Hey, talk to me! What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong is I feel like shit and no one seems to care!”

She screws up her face. “We care, Danger. But you’re not really giving me the opportunity to talk to you. You keep storming off.”

Slumping, I look at her and frown. “Sorry, I just hate that we’re finally getting somewhere, and I might fuck this up… yet again.”

She raises her eyebrow. “What? How?”

“My throat, Lunar, it’s my instrument. I can’t let anything be wrong with it.”

“Okay, but it’s just a cold, right?”

I slump my shoulders. “Hopefully,” I say.

She chews on her bottom lip and wraps her arm around my waist. “C’mon, let’s get you back to the penthouse?”

I can’t think of anything better.

Nodding, I slide my arm around her shoulders pulling her to me and kissing her hair as we walk toward the exit where Ryan, Nate, and Matt are already heading. Kane is by the door with the new security guys and we all walk out to the car and get in without any hassles. The car trip is silent, and my throat is still begging for a soothant of some sort. I’m hoping that by tomorrow, with some rest overnight, it will be much better.

We arrive at the hotel and up to our room in the penthouse, and upon walking inside Lunar and I notice a basket on the cabinet. She steps up to it and smiles.

“It’s all remedies and shit for your throat, babe.”

I walk up behind her to see cough medicine, throat lozenges, and a steam inhalation kit. Reaching forward, I grab the packet of lozenges and pop one out to help numb my throat. Lunar pulls out the steam kit and goes about setting it up for me. She really is good to me, and I treated her like crap tonight because I was worried about myself.

“Thank you,” I say as I sit on the bed.

She turns to me. “What for?”

“For being here for me, no matter what or how much of an asshole I am to you.”

She smiles walking over to me, placing her hands on my shoulders and looking down into my eyes. “I’m your girl. I knew something was wrong, but I also knew you’d come to me when you were ready. I’m just glad I can be here to help you now. Just know, I’m on your side. Always.”

Nodding, I move my head to the side and kiss her hand on my shoulder. She continues with the steam kit. “Don’t worry, Danger, this cold won’t even have time to come to the surface. We’re going to annihilate it before it even starts.”

Nodding, I think how lucky I truly am to have her.