Fran

Caspien had lost his mind. He never was the most stable guy, but I had never seen him like this. One minute he was doing okay and we were joking and the next minute he had snapped. I didn’t know what to do, so I locked myself in the bathroom. If he would have went away, I would have let it go, but he didn’t. Finally I had to call the cops, something that I knew he would never forgive me for, but what else was I supposed to do? The man scared the crap out of me when he was like this.

So when I felt like the bathroom door was going to come down, I ran. It was all I could think to do. There was nothing else to do but run and that was exactly what it was that I was doing.

The ground was further than it seemed and though I landed the right way, I could still feel the pressure in my ankles and knees when I hit the ground. There were two men that were looking my way, going into the darkness of the back gate. I had seen one of them before, but the tall redhead wasn’t one that I knew. Were they friends with Cass? I hoped not because I wanted to get away from him. This wasn’t the first time he had been this way. I blamed that crap he was on, but it didn’t matter. I just had to get out of here.

The shots fired got me moving and I made my way out of the yard and through the back yard into the street. Sirens were in the distance, coming closer and I needed to get some distance between me and this place. I don’t know what I was thinking getting with a guy like Caspien, but I had learned my lesson once and for all. It just wasn’t worth it to date a bad boy. It sounded good in theory. They are exciting and they will always keep you on your toes. But I was looking forward to some quiet in my life. After living with Cass the last couple of years, I needed it bad.

There was just a question of where I was going to go. My family was not around, but it didn’t matter. I had no cash, though I did have a friend that I could stay with from work. All I had to do was get far enough away from Caspien. I should have stayed and talked to the police, but I felt like Caspien would have had no problem turning me into a shield or leverage. It was easy to see that he didn’t care for me in the way that I hoped he would. I had hoped that he would see that he loved me and calm down. Whatever he was taking changed all of that though.

My eyes looked around for the two men that I had seen leaving next door. The first man that had seen me was tall and blonde. I had seen him around before. I just didn’t realize who he was. Why were they leaving out of the backdoor? Most likely they were as criminal as Cass was. There were just too many criminals around here and I needed to get out of this rotten neighborhood.

***

“Fran, wake up. Are you okay?”

The sun was bright in my eyes from it streaming in through the windows. It made me feel like my eyes were going to burn out of their own socket. Stephanie was looking down at me as if I had grown a third eye.

“What’s up?”

“It’s time for work. What happened last night?”

I remembered going to her and telling her as little as possible to get her to let me stay. Steph and I had been friends for a couple of years now, but I have never stopped by like I did last night. I was sure that I was a wreck. Cass had ripped some of my clothes when he was throwing me around. Now there was most likely bruising on my face because it hurt to even smile.

The grin I had for my friend turned into a grimace and I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to say. “Cass got on some drugs and went crazy I think. I snuck out the back window while he shot it out with the cops. I really don’t know what happened after that.”

I tried to be as nonchalant as possible. I didn’t want to have to worry about all of the questions. The truth was I didn’t know what had happened. I didn’t even know if Cass was still alive, but it begged to reason that he wouldn’t be. You can’t just shot at the cops around here. They shoot back in that neighborhood, they had to dealing with me like Caspien.

“What?”

I wasn’t going to repeat myself again. I didn’t see a point. Stephanie was just going to have to take me at my word. I was still tired and trying to remember why I was up so early.

“It’s fine Steph. Thanks for letting me stay here last night.”

I moved to get up and touched my head where it was killing me. I could feel the tenderness in my face and in other parts of my body. I felt like every inch of me had been hurt and there was nothing that I could do about it. I wanted her to see that I was fine, but that was a hard thing to do when I felt like I was going to keel over. This wasn’t the first time that Cass had put his hands on me, but I knew that it would be the last time. I was done.

“No problem Fran. You know that you are always welcome here. I just worry about you. Ever since you got with that guy, you have to put on makeup to hide what he does to you more often than not.”

“That is over now.” I thought that most likely Cass was over and I know that I should have been sad. I was in a way because there was a good man underneath it all, but at the end of the day, I was more relieved than anything else.

“I know. Do you think Ralph will let me take the day off?” I didn’t want anyone to see me like this. It was embarrassing, but like I said before, sadly it wasn’t the first time that I had shown up for a shift with a black eyes. This time it was just a little worse and it was everywhere. I felt like I was never going to be the same again, but I knew that it would pass, like it always does.

“I don’t know. You know that we are short because Kristy decided to quit. I think you should go in, if nothing else so that he can see.”

I felt like I was an animal in a zoo. I didn’t want him to know how bad it was or how bad I felt. I certainly didn’t want to hear him tell me that he told me so. I knew that is what Ralph would say. It was my fault that I hadn’t left him. There was truth in that, I could see it of course, but there wasn’t much that I thought I could really do about it. Cass was most likely taken care of.

“Yeah, I guess I don’t really have a choice. Now that I don’t have a place to stay, I definitely can’t lose my job too. It had been too much of a pain to get the one I have now.” She was right and I was thankful that Stephanie had her head on straight. I was too full of nerves to be thinking that clearly.

“Well come on. Take a shower and you will feel better. I am going to make some coffee. Do you want some?”

I told her that I did, though I didn’t drink coffee that often. I needed the bitter brew if I was going to make it through the day. My mind was full of what-ifs and it was only when I got under the hot steaming water that I was able to really get myself together. I was worried about all of the wrong things, I knew that now. When I had been worried about making Cass happy, I should have been running the other way.

“Better?”

“Yeah, I do feel better. The coffee smells good. Do you have any creamer?”

Stephanie handed it to me and I put enough in the coffee to get it closer to white than black. I had to put so much into the coffee to make it palatable, that I supposed there wasn’t much left of the actual caffeine drink. It was warm and sweet though, just what I needed as I took on another day looking like a punching bag.

As I looked in the mirror as I got ready, I told myself again that this was never going to happen. I was never going to let a man do this to me, but more than that, I wasn’t going to let Cass get me down. He was out of my life and that just left me able to move on.

***

Work was just as it always was. It was busy by the time me and Stephanie got there and Ralph made a comment about us being late. When I turned around to answer him, I forgot for a moment that I looked like I had been hit by a Mack truck. It wasn’t until I seen Ralph’s face that I remembered.

“Fran…”

“Sorry Ralph. We didn’t mean to be late. It wasn’t Stephanie’s fault. She was nice enough to let me stay with her last night and I think that I kept her up.”

He was staring at my face and the quiet man just shook his head. I knew that he wasn’t going to admonish me or yell because we were late. He was going to do something far worse. Ralph was going to give me that look of pity that I hated so much. Didn’t he understand that I hated the pity more than anything else? I would rather him be angry at me. That I was okay with it for some reason. If he was angry, then that meant that he wouldn’t give me that look that I hated to see so much.

“Fran, what happened?”

Steph chimed in and told him the basics. It was most likely already known. Like I had said before, this certainly wasn’t the first time in the last six months that I had come to work like this. This time it was just worse.

“Fran, I hope you are going to leave that man. He is going to kill you. You have to see that.”

I could see that of course. It wasn’t hard at all to see and know that if I didn’t get away from Cass, he was going to kill me. But maybe I didn’t have to worry about him anymore. I still didn’t know what happened last night over at his house, but I heard the gunshots. People can’t just shoot at the police. I felt like something was going to have to come from all of this. There was no way that shooting the police was going to get him anywhere but dead.

I had too much stuff over at his house to get and it got me wondering what I was going to find when I got there. I knew that whatever happened though, I was going to be okay. I wasn’t going to let Cass bring me down anymore. I was done with men like him.

“I know Ralph. I don’t think I am going to have to worry about him anymore. He messed up and got into it with the police.”

“What do you mean?”

“When I left they were shooting at each other. I jumped out one of the windows in the back. I don’t know what happened, but I am sure that Cass isn’t my problem anymore.”

He looked shocked and it told me that maybe I should feel the same way. I didn’t though. I was far more worried about what was going to happen to me. How I was going to get my things and where was I going to go next? It was a relief on one side of the coin, but then again, it wasn’t. I did love Cass in my own way. There was a good man in there, but the drugs brought out the worst in him. That was just the way it was.

“Well you worry me Fran. I will be happy when you are away from him. Have you checked the news to see what happened after you left?”

I shook my head that I hadn’t. I didn’t want to go there and find out what happened from one of the neighbors. There was still a chance that Cass was there and I wasn’t going to take that chance. I was going to have to see what happened first another way that didn’t put me into danger. I still had to get my stuff out of the house, but I was far more worried about what I was going to do afterward I got it.

“Thanks for understanding Ralph.”

He waved me off and told me that I just had to let this all sink in. “Let this be the last time that you come in here like this Fran. You are a beautiful girl and you don’t deserve this. There are plenty of men that would love to treat you the way that you deserve to be treated.”

I had a feeling he meant himself. I just smiled and kind of nodded my head like I agreed with him. It wasn’t the first time I questioned the boss’ attitude. It made me feel like he was nice to me because he wanted to be that man, but Ralph wasn’t my type. Not even in the least bit and even if I gave up on the bad boys, I wouldn’t go that way.