Fran

It had been a crazy week. After what happened at the cabin, there was a big part of me that just wanted to leave the city behind and all of the craziness that had happened there. I was tired of the drama, but there was no reason to run now. Lucas had taken care of all of that for me and for that I was thankful. We had talked a couple of times, but it was hard to. Every time I talked to him I was reminded of that day and it wasn’t a memory that I wanted to really hold onto.

I was back at Stephanie’s visiting and she was just happy to have Caspien gone as well. I still felt bad that I had dragged her into this, but she was forgiving and I couldn’t have asked for anything more. After everything that the two of us had gone through, I couldn’t have bared it if we had gotten into it again. I needed my friend and I think in a way she needed me. Having Cass in our lives was hard to get over and it was just taking time. Time that Lucas didn’t want to take. He called every day to see if I was ready to go out with him, I still wasn’t. I didn’t know if I ever would be. While Lucas was so different than Cass, there were still similarities that were hard to ignore.

The phone rang and I stared at it. I knew who it was before I even looked at the phone. He always called me about the same time and when I saw the time, I picked up the phone.

“Hello?”

“You actually picked up today.”

“You are persistent Lucas.”

“I was promised a date and then you have ignored me since I dropped you off at her friend’s place.”

How was it that he didn’t understand why? It had been too much, all of it had been just too much and Lucas acted like he was not at fault. He wasn’t involved with what had happened, but Lucas was too much like Caspien to forget that point. I didn’t want to go down that road again. I had learned a lesson if nothing else.

Now that I was staying in Cass’ house, it made me realize even more. I would find caches of money and drugs periodically. Several times just this week I had found things. There was no telling what more was here. I had a feeling that Lucas was no better. I had been in that life for a long time and I didn’t want to continue on in that way. This was my warning and in a way I felt like it was my last chance.

“I don’t know what to say Lucas. I don’t think that it would be a good idea to go out. You and I want two very different things. When I get around you, I don’t think straight and I can’t do that right now.”

I could see his eyes smoldering in my mind. He would be angry, something that I made him on a daily basis, whether I answered the phone or not.

“I just want you Fran. That is all I know and I went through a lot to get you. I am not going to just let this go. I can’t.”

It sounded good, it always did because he had a way of saying the sweetest things, but it didn’t change anything. I was trying to live a clean life and he was making it hard to do that. I missed the rush of adrenaline, but there was a downside. I had been acutely reminded of that downside with Cass last week.

“We don’t even know each other Lucas.”

“I’ve been trying to get to know you. You are a hard woman to get to know. If I was a lesser man, I would have given up with all of the rebuffs that you have thrown my way.”

If he was smart he would have. “What do you want Lucas? I won’t ever say anything about what happened at Cass’ shack. You saved my life and I will never forget that, but I don’t know where that leaves us.”

“I am not worried about you talking Fran. Why would I be? This has nothing to do with that. This has to do with me and you. It just feels right, doesn’t it? When you are in my arms, it just feels right.”

I know that it felt some kind of way, but right may not have been how I would have categorized it. It was scary and I didn’t know what was going to happen next. There was something in the air when I was with him, something that made me tremble inside when he was so close. I don’t know what it was, but never had I thought right. When I was around Lucas I had fever and chills, all at the same time. How could that be right?

“I don’t know what I feel Lucas.”

“You promised to go out with me Fran and I am going to hold you to it.”

I did and I was the type of person that needed to keep my word. I wouldn’t feel right if I said I was going to do something and I just didn’t. It was not right and I knew that.

“I did say that Lucas.”

“Well might as well get it over with then.”

Being with him was hard on me and even though I liked him, I did want to get it over with. I was just afraid of what would happen after the date. I was attracted to him, had been since I met him and I had a feeling that I was going to find it impossible to tell him no. I didn’t want to, even now on the phone. His silky voice was hard to deny and once he was looking at me with those blue eyes that clouded over with a storm, I wouldn’t be able to think straight. That is how it always went and Lucas was a man that got what he wanted.

“Tonight?”

“Yes, now?”

“I need time to get ready.”

“No you don’t. I am sure you look perfect.”

I looked down at the clothes I was wearing. It was just a pair of shorts and a tank top, certainly nothing fancy.

“I at least need to put some pants on.”

The sound he made got me laughing. “Why don’t I just come over there and you can reconsider the putting pants on thing? I wouldn’t mind seeing that at all. Would just make it easier for dessert.”

Why did I want to tell him to just come over? It was exactly what I wanted, what I expected this date to end with, but I was still trying to convince myself that I could change it or that I even wanted to.

“No, not here. I will meet you somewhere.”

“Let me pick you up.”

“I am staying at Cass’.”

“So, I figured you would. Might as well. The house is paid for.”

“That doesn’t bother you?”

“Why would it Fran? Nothing bothers me except not seeing you. I have waited long enough for this date. You owe me and I intend to collect.”

“That is what I was afraid of. Meet me at The Mill on 3rd. We can have a couple of drinks there.”

He agreed, but I could tell that it wasn’t really what he wanted. I was okay with that though. He wasn’t going to get what he wanted, so Lucas might as well get used to it. I was still trying to convince myself that I wouldn’t give in as soon as I saw him. How many times had I wondered what his hands on me would feel like?

“Okay Fran. I will see you in twenty.”

That wasn’t enough time, but I wasn’t going to argue. I wanted to get him off of the phone so that I could freak out little bit. I needed to, I already was if the truth be told, but that didn’t matter. I said I would go and he knew where I lived. Lucas wouldn’t take no for too much longer, so like he said, I needed to just get it over with and then I wouldn’t have it constantly on the back of my mind.