Blain

The sound of hammers and men yelling over power tools is such an everyday thing to me that I don’t even notice it anymore as I walk around the construction site, inspecting the progress of my latest investment, a hotel that’s going up on the Best real estate in San Francisco.

I have big dreams for this one, though God knows I don’t need another hotel or investment, since I’m richer than half the men in this city. The other half are just about on par with me and they should be, since one of them is my cousin Gray and the other two are my best friends Val and Isaac.

Together we make up a team that dabbles in everything from real estate, to banking. Hell, we even own a franchise of tire outfits and a few small garages in outlying towns close to home.

“Yo, Blay! You done here, man, we gotta bounce before my mom calls again and threatens to kill us all,” Gray barks out, impatiently tapping at his watch to remind me of the time.

Tonight is not something I want to think about. It’s my mom’s birthday, a party that is being attended by all the elite and something that I would rather not attend, even on pain of death.

I do not like my mother. Not because she’s some abusive monster or neglected me during childhood. No, it’s just frankly a sad fact that my mom is not a nice person and I can’t stand that. Hence the fact that I spent more time at my aunt Char and uncle Eddie’s house with Gray, than I did at home.

My dad I don’t mind, not that I know him all that well since he spends most of his time at the college where he has tenure as the economics professor, and the other half boning his long-time mistress.

Mom knows all this, and yet she doesn’t seem to care as long as dad still has his inheritance and keeps her in style while he ‘dabbles’ at his pesky hobby.

The truth is, my parents suck and they always have. Mom’s not too bad when it comes to loving me, she just isn’t very present and never has been and I think my father actually forgot I existed until I turned eighteen and started my business with the boys, foregoing college since I seemed like a waste of time.

“Blay!”

“Coming! Just let me sign off on this inspection and double check the incoming materials and we can leave.”

Turning back to the task at hand, and praying that I somehow slip and fall to my death to avoid this party, I freeze when a flash of hot pink catches my eye across the street.

A woman is walking what I assume is a dog; at least it could be a dog. I think. And she’s talking to it with so much animation I feel a grin split my lips.

It’s quirky, but not what’s caught my attention. No, that honour belongs to the fact that she’s wearing an eyeball blitzing pink dress that’s strapless and clings to an amazing rack before belling out in layers of calf length tulle, resembling a long, puffy tutu.

This outrageous ensemble is topped off by a messy bun that looks un-brushed and lemon yellow sneakers that clash with everything else. She looks like a disaster, something so out of the ordinary that I drop the clipboard in my hand and just stare, completely spellbound by the spectacle she and that fur ball are making.

For some reason as she continues to lecture the yapping, leaping dog, I can’t do anything but just take her in this far away. Three floors up in the shell of what will be one of the grandest hotels in the city, I can’t quite see her face clearly, but it doesn’t matter.

She looks like exactly what I need right now to bring some colour into the gloom that’s surrounding me.

“Blay, dammit, I-”

Gray stops snarling at me and huffs out a laugh as the little fairy in the pink dress puts her hands on her hips, stamps one yellow shod foot and commences yelling at the mutt like a schoolmarm with a grudge.

The din around us cuts off by increments and in under a minute I can hear her clearly, as can all the men around me who’ve taken notice and stopped working abruptly.

“I told you to stay away from her, Jack! She’s a pedigree and her owners are not nice people and now! Now I have to pay freaking child support because you can’t keep it in your fur.”

Jack barks once, as if in denial and shakes his head, making Tinkerbelle throw her hands up with a shriek.

“Who wants a girl named Muffin anyway? That’s so clichéd Jack. Our line has class, grit and we always choose partners who understand the gypsy way. We do not settle down and make babies we can’t afford to put through doggy college!”

The scene is outrageous, that’s the only word that pops to mind as a puff of laughter escapes me, the other chuckles of amusement muffled behind hands as shoulders shake and heave.

Good old Jack yips and stomps his legs in a parody of Tink’s, and I practically hear her sigh as she looks up at the sky, her shoulders slumped.

“This is unacceptable and you know it. I’m taking you to the vet tomorrow before I end up paying child support to half the damn city you little lothario. Now stop sassing me and do your business before I do something really mean, like forget to buy your biscuits.”

Ouch. I hear all the guys groan at the mention of the poor little bastard losing his nuts and feel his pain in my own.

The dog barks, his mottled coat of stringy fur practically standing on end. I swear, it looks like he’s arguing with her, and that assumption is damn near confirmed when Tink stiffens up dramatically and lets out an enraged shriek.

“Don’t you dare blame this on me you little cad. I didn’t sniff her ass and impregnate her. Now pee or I swear I will dump you at grandma’s and let her put you in those outfits she knitted for you. After I have you snipped. Ungrateful wretch.”

The laughter is hard to control and I hear one guy sigh in adoration as Gray shakes his head and snorts.

“Stop that right now, you have no leg to stand on here Jack. You knocked her up and that’s that. You’re going to doggy slave labour camp to work this off you adorable little beast and that is that.”

The fact that she just called him adorable while cussing him out is hilarious. Add in the fact that she’s dressed like my new wet dream and I know I’m caught, kissing my freedom goodbye with nary a shudder of resistance.

This woman, whoever she is must be mine. I know it in my bones, feel it in my skin. My life’s been a grey wasteland for so long that I can hardly understand how one little puff of pink could possibly have taken me down so swiftly.

I’m the guy who doesn’t call after the first date. Not ever. I see a pretty woman; I seduce her and then move the hell on before they can start painting dreams in their heads of love and happily ever afters.

I’m the guy who wears a condom and pulls out anyway because I’m terrified of one slip that will lead to a lifetime of commitment. Looking at Tink, right here, right now, I have the overwhelming need to sweep her up and lock her away in my tower above the city so that no one can ever threaten the claim I want to have on her.

“Oh, Jack, I didn’t mean that booboo, I’m just stressed is all. Don’t be mad buddy.” She croons suddenly, leaning over to coo at the little runt.

“What is that? Is she even real?” Gray breathes while hardened men all around me sigh and look on as if captivated.

His tone is filled with wonder but I ignore him and start walking fast, needing to get down there. Right now. He follows me down to the ground level and off the site because my only objective now is to meet that wonderful creature and ask her if I can pay child support too. For the dozen babies I want to have with her glorious self.

Here’s the thing, I know a good thing when I see it, I always have. That’s the reason I hit my first million before the age of twenty and the reason I am now rich enough to buy a good portion of the country. Aunt Char says I was born under a lucky star and Uncle Ed says I’m a shark. All I know is, I know a good thing when I see it and Tinkerbell is probably one of the best deals I have ever seen.

And I have to have her.

“Blay.”

Coming out of the building I hear the guys all yell my name just before I look up to see my target lifting her ugly dog and sliding into a cab, her little bun hitting the roof before disappearing from sight.

I’m running before I can form another thought, desperation nipping at my heels as the cab takes off in the opposite direction, stealing my future wife right out from under my nose.

“No!”

It’s ridiculous, I know it is even as I run like hell and dodge traffic, but for some inexplicable reason I need to get to her before she disappears from my life forever.

“Tink!”

The cab speeds off and turns a corner even as Gray runs behind me, our yells piercing the air and the sound of men yelling getting louder. The entire construction crew is egging me on, screaming at me to run faster but I get less than a block before I have to stop and face the facts, my knees almost giving out under me.

She’s gone. That colourful sprite, my baby mama who I have never met before, is gone. And I don’t have a clue how to start looking for her

“Shit man. What the hell was that?” Gray barks, wheezing as his hands plant on his knees and he struggles for breath.

“Mine,” I say starkly, looking down at him before closing my eyes in stark dejection. “She’s mine.”